


Sweater Vests and Black Lace

by DarnItTumbleweed



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Eventual Smut, F/M, Falling In Love, First Kiss, Love, Neighbors, Romance, goth girlfriend, season one
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:47:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 25,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23714644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarnItTumbleweed/pseuds/DarnItTumbleweed
Summary: Spencer Reid knows a little more about the girl next door than he'd like to admit. The black parasol and the black lipstick should have been his first hint that Rose Walsh was a little odd. Reid can't help but to like her though. He's sure that she'd never look twice at him though. Reid is pretty sure he's not her type at all. Little does he know Rose Walsh has found herself equally as fascinated by her shy and somewhat awkward next door neighbor. Sure he's kind of a nerd, but he seems sweet. As a romance blossoms between the two can they manage to make it work, or are they just too different to ever last?
Relationships: Spencer Reid/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 133





	1. Crush

**Author's Note:**

> This is basically me jumping on the goth girlfriend for Reid train. This will take place during the first season and may go into more seasons depending on what feels right.

Reid couldn’t stop himself from letting out an exasperated sigh as he entered the apartment complex he’d been living in for about three years now. He knew he was pouting, his shoulders drooping a frown fixed on his face.

He couldn’t help but to feel that his day couldn’t possibly get any worst.

He’d arrived to work this morning only to be told to go home by Hotch. It wasn’t fair. He’d passed his psyche evaluation and everything was just fine. Shouldn’t that be enough to warrant him being able to return to work?

Hotch had said no though. This was mandatory Reid been told. Philip Dowd had died Reid having been the one who’d pulled the trigger. Philip Dowd had been an absolute madman; shooting and maiming his victims from a long distance so he could “fix” them in the ER. He got a thrill out of it…but he’d managed to kill a few of his victims. The BAU had arrived at the hospital not even knowing who their unsub was, but Dowd had realized the game was up. He’d decided he wanted to go out in a hail of bullets and take as many victims with him as he could. Dowd had taken hostages in that Emergency Room, Reid and Hotch being caught up in the mess. Reid had to act fast. Shooting Dowd wasn’t an ideal way to end the case, but Reid had no choice. He hadn’t even intended to shoot him in the head…he’d been aiming for his leg. He guessed for once his poor marksmanship had worked out for him.

He felt awful of course, but he’d followed Gideon’s advice. He’d remembered three things; He did what he had to do. A lot of good people lived because of what he had to do and Gideon was proud of him for doing what had to be done.

He knew it would just be a matter of taking it one day at a time. The psych evaluation had helped, though Reid wasn’t a huge fan of therapy…given his family history of mental illness and all.

To be honest he’d been looking forward to getting back to work. It had already been one week since that case, but Hotch had informed him that one week off wasn’t enough.

Reid was stuck on two weeks paid time off to be followed by two weeks stuck on desk duty. According to Hotch this was non-negotiable.

It had been less than 24 hours though and Reid was already feeling strained. knew he was probably being a little over dramatic, but he’d like to think he was justified. He could be doing far more at work than he could do stuck at home.

Reid tried to tell himself that there was plenty for him to do at home. He could reread a few novels, watch some Star Trek reruns, he could sleep in and take it easy.

His self reassurances did little to soothe his bad mood though.

He let out another heavy sigh deciding he might as well check his mail before he headed back up to his apartment. He used his key unlocking his mail box rolling his eyes at the stack of junk mail he pulled out; credit card offers and fliers for take out. There was at least a letter from his mother…and a package.

He frowned at the last item in the box. The package was heavy and wrapped in brown paper. His frown only grew more as he spotted the address on the package. It wasn’t his.

The sight of his next door neighbor’s name did funny things to Spencer Reid’s heart. Rose Walsh Apartment 22.

He felt his heart race at the sight of her name, how could even just the sight of her name make him feel so breathless? 

He’d barely spoken more than a few words to Rose Walsh, but he had found himself knowing more about the girl next door than he’d like to admit.

Reid hated to admit that he hadn’t even really noticed when someone had moved into the empty unit next door to him. Then again, he didn’t pay very much attention to his neighbors at all. He minded his business and they minded their own. Of course the old widow across the hall from Reid spoke to him on occasion, but it was mostly small talk and the occasional request to open a glass jar for her.

For the most part though Reid didn’t really get to know his neighbors. He honestly didn’t really have many friends to be honest, not outside of work. He tended to be a bit of a loner, he’d long ago learned that he had a hard time relating to people especially in social settings.

So he hadn’t really paid much attention when Rose Walsh moved in next door.

Rose Walsh had been living next door to Reid for a full month before he’d finally spotted her for the first time.

He’d been coming home after a long case having been told he should get some rest, paperwork could wait until tomorrow.

He hadn’t been expecting to see her, but she was kind of hard to miss. The girl standing out front talking to the maintenance guy Ed, was unusual to say the least.

He hadn’t really meant to stare, but she was so…odd.

She seemed so tiny, as though she shouldn’t really stand out at all…her outfit made her hard to ignore though.

Reid had spotted the parasol she’d been holding first; an oddly shaped black umbrella shielding it’s holder from the summer sun. He’d spotted her outfit next; a long black dress made of solid material until it reached her mid thigh. The fabric below her mid thigh was made out of a lace material giving him perfect view of her fishnet stockings and her shoes. Her shoes were a tall pair of black wedge platforms, so tall Reid had to wonder how she could ever walk in them. The sleeves of her dress made her look a bit bat-like as they belled out at her elbows.

He hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but there was just something about her voice. It was so soft so gentle. It almost held the sweetness he’d associate with an elementary school teacher…not the odd woman standing there complaining about her busted A/C.

Reid had felt his cheeks grow pink as she’d turned to face him. A voice had rung out in the back of his brain as he took her features in: She’s stunning.

She was pale, almost milky pale…he had a feeling the parasol she was carrying was meant to protect her from losing that porcelain complexion. Her long hair was pitch black and not a strand of it seemed to be out of place as it hung loosely framing her face perfectly curled at the tips. Everything about her seemed so small; almost delicate and doll like. He studied her features taking in a small upturned nose, full lips, a slight hint of dimples at her cheeks. The black lipstick and the black nail polish she wore made her seem all the more fair skinned.

She’d stared at him a well manicured dark eyebrow raising as she spotted him staring at her. Her lips remained expressionless and disinterested in her admirer as she pushed up the round black sunshades she’d been wearing to rest on top of her head. Reid had felt even more breathless as he’d spotted her eyes; they were the prettiest shade of gray he’d ever seen. Pretty didn’t even seem to be an appropriate word to describe them; gorgeous or breathtaking seemed more appropriate. They were a cool grayish blue tone.

He couldn’t ignore the statistic in the back of his brain that pointed out that only 3% of the population had gray eyes meaning out of the seven billion people who inhabited the earth only 210 million people had gray eyes…Reid couldn’t help but to think that he was currently staring at the most stunning set of gray eyes out of this 210 million though.

They’d shared eye contact for the briefest moment before the ring of Reid’s cell phone had broken him out of his trance. It was another case; he had to leave now. He’d turned from her as he’d spoken on his cell reassuring Hotch that he would be there soon.

As he’d turned back towards the apartment he’d been unable to ignore the way his heart sank as he realized his pretty neighbor was nowhere in sight.

He’d tried to shove all thoughts of her from his brain, but that was easier said than done. It was almost funny. She’d been his neighbor for months, but he’d just now begun to notice her presence. He couldn’t ignore her presence in fact.

He tended to spot her in the halls as she came and went she always shooting him a small cool smile that made him feel lightheaded, though he hadn’t worked up the nerve to even say hi to her as they’d passed one another.

He could sometimes hear her music playing through the thin walls separating their units from one another. He could barely make out the words to whatever she was listening to, but he could at least make out a beat very faintly…It didn’t sound like anything Reid would ever think to listen to. He usually preferred Mozart…this wasn’t Mozart.

He couldn’t find it in himself to feel annoyed by her music, in a way it had almost become comforting. He knew it was coming, every night around eight it’d start and it’d play for an hour or so before he heard her front door open and shut hinting she was leaving for the night. It was a routine he’d sunken into in a way. He knew it probably sounded pathetic, but the routine of hearing her music every night had made him feel less lonely as he sat alone reading in his own apartment.

Reid could admit he easily recognized her car at this point, though he told himself it was only because she parked right next to him in her assigned spot. She drove a little black car, a little Ford Focus. He’d easily spotted the rosary hanging from her rear view mirror and the leopard print seat covers. He could also spot the bumper sticker on the fender; a black and white sticker from a nearby animal shelter that stated simply: I Brake for Strays.

He hadn’t really been forced to actually speak to her until her mail had begun to arrive in his post box. He guessed the mailman had made a mistake. His plan had been to just slip it under her door. He could just slide the letter right under her door; no fuss, no communication.

He’d been about to slide the letter under the door when she’d opened it looking a little less than impressed as she stared down at him. He’d stood rather quickly practically shoving the mail at her his voice frantic as he stumbled over his own words. “I uh-I wasn’t sure if you were home…it’s late, so I was just going to slide this under the door. It was in my box…I think the post office made a mistake.”

She twisted her lips looking as though she was trying not to smile at how flustered he’d seemed. When she’d spoken he’d felt his heart race all the more. “It’s not late for me…I work nights.”

She’d taken the letter from him staring down at it for a moment before she stared back up at him. “Thank you…I don’t know your name?”

“Spencer Reid…Uh, Dr. Spencer Reid. I live next door in apartment 23.” He’d blurted out his heart still slamming in his chest.

She’d raised an eyebrow at the title doctor. He looked far too young to be a doctor. She kept her lips sealed though choosing not to question it instead giving him a cool calm smile as she spoke. “Thank you Dr. Reid, have a nice evening. I should get let you go. I need to get ready for work.”

And with that she’d shut the door leaving Reid standing there his cheeks still so pink his heart still beating so quickly.

He’d only spoken to her again a week later when he’d boarded the elevator in his apartment a little later than usual one morning knowing he’d not have time to grab his usual cup of coffee on the way to the BAU. She’d slipped into the elevator behind him and all he could focus on was the scent of her perfume. It smelled like patchouli, saffron and a citrus scent…maybe orange peel. She’d been wearing another dress though this one lacked the lace panel at the bottom and it was a deep purple tone. He’d felt his heart race as he’d spotted the black corset styled belt over her waist the accessory making her figure all the more apparent and the hint of cleavage he could see all the more noticeable.

As the elevator had reached the lobby and she’d stepped out she’d spoken to him over her shoulder. “Have a nice day Dr. Reid.”

Reid had barely managed to squeak out a “you too.” as he watched her walk away his heart racing. To be honest it had raced all day long and though he knew it wasn’t possible he still could swear he could smell the scent of her perfume hanging around him.

Her mail had continued to arrive in his box and he’d continued to bring it to her, though he’d never managed to actually have a real conversation with her. He wanted to have a real conversation with her though, he wanted it more than anything.

He had no idea how to even begin to speak to her though. A little voice in the back of his brain told him that they probably had absolutely nothing in common at all. She seemed so…cool…so different from anyone else he’d ever met…she seemed like she wouldn’t look twice at someone like him.

Reid could admit he’d googled the parasol she’d been carrying that first day he’d spotted her. He couldn’t help but to be curious. He’d never quite seen a parasol like the one she’d been holding before. It was such an interesting shape. He was curious….so he’d fallen down the google rabbit hole looking at parasols until he’d spotted one identical to the one she’d been carrying.

The parasol she’d been carrying was apparently called a pagoda parasol. From there he’d found links of where you could buy ones like the one she’d been carrying.

He’d found himself feeling a bit clueless as he clicked on a bunch of shops carrying goth fashions. He’d felt pretty clueless as he found himself looking into the style. It seemed to be less of a fashion statement and more of a lifestyle.

What Reid had seen had convinced him all the more than his pretty neighbor would have nothing in common with him.

Telling himself that she wouldn’t have anything in common with him hadn’t dampened the obvious crush he’d developed on her though. He felt pathetic, liking her as much as he did. He had barely spoken more than a few words to her, but he couldn’t stop his heart from swooning over her every single time he spotted her around the apartment complex.

He let out a heavy sigh as he stared down at the package in his hands. She’d already mentioned to him that she worked nights, so she was more than likely upstairs in her own apartment. He really should take this package to her.

Reid felt his feet move on their own accord his heart doing that annoying clinching thing he noticed it always seemed to do any time he realized he might be able to talk to Rose Walsh.

He found himself standing in front of apartment 22 his stomach in knots as he tried to work up the nerve to knock. This wasn’t a big deal, he told himself. He’d taken her a dozen pieces of her mail before.

He took a deep breath as he reached up ready to knock, but his fist didn’t even have the opportunity to meet the wooden door before it opened her eyes widening in shock at the sight of him.

He lowered his hand his cheeks flushing as he stared down at her. He’d never seen her this dressed down before. Her dark hair was pulled back into a messy bun and she had not a spot of makeup on her face making her look all the younger. He tried not to allow his eyes to drift down her body. She was wearing black leggings that hugged her hips and a black tank top that did little to hide her cleavage. She must have been sleeping he realized…she worked nights after all, didn’t she?

He felt his cheeks flush all the more as he spotted the black ink along her forearm; a detailed flower…a single chrysanthemum. She usually wore longer sleeves, at least she did when he’d seen her. He’d never noticed the tattoo before.

She was the one finally spoke nodding down to the package in his hands. “I’m assuming that’s for me?”

“Yes.” He worked out his voice a little higher than he’d like.

He shifted in place surprised as she spoke up nodding her head. “I think I got something of yours in my box again. I thought about sliding under your door, but I thought I should probably give it to you in person. It looked pretty important.”

She spoke again opening the door a little wider. “Would you mind coming in? I don’t want the cat to get out.”

Reid felt his heart race at the request. She was inviting him in? She was letting him into her apartment?

He wordlessly did as requested following her inside she shutting the door behind them as she spoke. “I’ll take that. I’ve been waiting for these beads for weeks.”

Reid felt his breath quicken as her hand brushed against his she taking the package from him. He frowned ever so slightly tempted to ask her about the beads she’d mentioned.

He stared down as the cat she’d mentioned approached him. It was a black cat, he knew he shouldn’t have been surprised. Of course she owned a black cat. He felt himself stiffen up ever so slightly as the cat rubbed against his legs sliding in between them a low purr echoing off of it. At least it wasn’t hissing…he guessed maybe the Reid Effect only applied to dogs…and kids…but at least cats were immune.

Rose let out a soft chuckle scooping the cat up. “Bela come on, leave him alone.”

“She was fine…I mean, I don’t mind.” He replied his cheeks flushing unable to stop himself from admiring the healthy view of cleavage he was exposed to as Rose bent over to pick up her cat.

She gave him a small smile as she corrected him. “Bela is a he actually…named for Bela Lugosi.”

Reid nodded his head unable to stop himself from speaking relieved that she was apparently a fan of something he at least had some familiarity with. “Oh, You’re a horror fan?”

He felt his heart swoon at the small smile she gave him. “Yes, classic horror. Dracula is one of my favorite films.”

Reid spoke up the words sliding from him easily eager to share some knowledge with her, it being far more comfortable for him to do than any attempt at small talk. “Did you know that when Bela Lugosi stared in Dracula he only made around five hundred dollars a week? He was so desperate for the role that he accepted such a low paycheck. He actually had to really fight to get the role in the first place…Universal didn’t want to pick him because he wasn’t a well known actor. The director actually wanted another actor for the role, but after the actor died before production of the film could begin, Lugosi was given the role.”

Rose raised an eyebrow a little thrown off by this bit of information. She gave him a soft smile apparently not minding it though. “I didn’t know that actually.”

She spoke again dropping the package off on a nearby table as she carried the cat away with her. “I have your mail in the kitchen, let me go grab it.”

He stood in place his heart still racing as he took in every detail of her apartment. Though the layout of her apartment was identical to his own, everything else about it was different. He wasn’t surprised by all the black though there were a few hints of purple and crimson red.

The space was definitely just as cluttered as his own apartment. Though while his apartment was filled with books, Rose’s apartment seemed to be filled with a variety of things; crystals, candles, a few ceramic skull sculptures, he could spot a framed drawing of an Ouija board on the wall. He could spot a taxidermy bunny placed under a heavy looking glass case. There were a few animal skulls as well; raccoon and fox. There were plenty of records none of the bands he recognized: Bauhaus, Joy Division, The Cure, and a few others.

He spotted a tall black bookcase his eyes scanning the books within it; lots of horror novels, quite a few cookbooks, and one book that caught his eyes The Complete Works of Edgar Allan Poe.

He couldn’t stop himself from stepping forward his eyes catching the clutter spread out across a desk; it looked as though she’d been making jewelry judging by all the beads and tools spread out across the table.

He felt a fondness wash over him as he stared down at a box of finished jewelry and pins. It all seemed to be Halloween themed.

Reid jumped a little as she approached him her voice sounding out spotting him admiring the pieces below him. “That’s part of why you keep having to deliver all those packages to me. More supplies.”

Reid cleared his throat working the question from his lips as he dared to stare back up at her though he wanted to slam his palm against his face knowing his question was stupid. “You made these?”

She nodded her head tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Yeah…I mean when I’m not bar tending…This is just overstock left over from Halloween. Which is why I’m happy to see that package you brought me. I need to get started on an order I got through my online store and I was waiting on those beads to finish the piece.”

She held the letter out to him her voice soft. “This is yours by the way…I thought it might be important.”

Reid felt his stomach turn as he spotted the return address: Bennington Sanitarium…it was from his mom.

He took a deep breath praying she didn’t notice the return address as he spoke up nodding back down to the jewelry. “Thanks…You like Halloween?”

She gave him a soft smile thankfully not bringing up the letter. “I do, I love it actually…I didn’t get to do much for it this year though…I had to work. The club I bar tend at is always super busy on Halloween. Which made Halloween pretty dull to be honest…Do you like Halloween?”

“I love it…it’s my favorite holiday.” Reid admitted that sense of fondness washing over him again. She loved Halloween.

He spoke again clearing his throat the words falling right out of him finding it a bit easier to speak to her know that he at least knew they shared some common ground. “October is actually my favorite month…mostly because of Halloween and the fact that my birthday is on the 28th…To be totally honest I didn’t really get to celebrate either Halloween or my birthday much this year…I had a…work came up. So yeah, my Halloween was pretty boring this year.”

He bit the inside of his cheek deciding not to go into too much detail concerning just what his work was…He’d almost blurted out that he’d been called away on a case on his birthday…it was probably best not to have to explain that he was not only in the FBI but that his job involved serial killers and some of the other worst parts of society.

Rose raised an eyebrow at his comment about work. She could admit she’d spotted his ID badge a few times when she’d seen him around the apartment complex. The FBI symbol was pretty hard to miss.

She’d been a bit stunned by the FBI thing…Dr. Reid looked more like he should be hanging out in a bookstore or maybe working as an accountant…he didn’t look like he could possibly be in the FBI. That badge begged to differ though.

She also had to admit that her neighbor fascinated her. The man standing in front of her was a bit of a mystery, she’d begun to realize.

She’d been stunned that first time he’d introduced himself to her; Dr. Spencer Reid…he looked far too young to be a doctor. He had to close to her age, he looked close to her age at least.

She could admit she’d been curious about him from the moment she’d spotted him staring at her.

She’d could remember that day she’d spotted him staring at her that first time. She’d spotted him before he’d noticed her that first time. She’d spotted him soon after she’d moved into her apartment. She’d seen him leaving his apartment for work as she was arriving home from work. He’d never really glanced her way though. He seemed as though he was always in a hurry, always lost in his own head.

She hadn’t put too much thought into it when she’d spotted him staring at her that day all those months ago. Not to sound arrogant or over dramatic, but she was pretty accustomed to people staring at her.

Rose had been interested in the goth subculture since she was a teenager. It had saved her life, or at least that was what she’d told people.

She’d only been thirteen when her father had died…they’d been close and it had been hard to cope.

The goth subculture had given her a sense of comfort during her grieving period. She’d found comfort in the fashion and the music. It had given her joy in a difficult time.

Her mother had thought it was a phase. She’d complained when Rose had dyed her blonde hair black and she’d rolled her eyes at the black wardrobe. She’d really hated the music and the interest in the more morbid side of life. Rose’s mother had told her she’d grow out of the goth look, but Rose had known it wasn’t just a moody teenage phase for her.

Dressing this way and loving these things had brought her a real sense of comfort. It had made her feel pretty and mysterious.

At twenty three years old Rose was just as deep into the goth culture as ever. She had long ago learned to be comfortable in her own skin…even if people didn’t always get it.

She knew her personal sense of style was a little on the kooky side. She’d long ago grown accustomed to curious stares in response to her choice in wardrobe. Most of the time people minded their own business, but on occasion she’d get a rude comment.

She’d tried not to let her feelings get hurt. Back home people had been pretty rude most of the time. She was from a small town, and she definitely had stuck out like a sore thumb back home. It was a little easier to feel that she wasn’t so odd in Washington DC. The big city had enough people who were into the goth scene, at least more people than her little hometown had.

When she’d spotted Reid staring at her that day she’d expected a look of judgment. She’d been surprised to find only interest in his eyes, a gentle curiosity. She could admit she’d felt a little vulnerable under his gaze. He had been staring at her like she was a work of art. It wasn’t a look she was accustomed to receiving from people.

It was the first time she’d ever gotten a good look at him aside from the passing moments she’d spotted him leaving his apartment in the mornings.

She had to admit, he was kind of cute…in sort of a nerdy way. He wasn’t the kind of guy she usually found herself attracted to…but he had a certain boyish charm to him. He was handsome, a bit too thin really and she’d definitely noticed the dark circles under his eyes hinting that he didn’t get much sleep…his sense of style was definitely nerdy. The sweater vests she’d spotted him in where a bit of a dorky fashion choice…but all in all she found him pretty adorable.

She had noticed the way his cheeks flushed any of the times they’d spoken, when he’d brought her her mail or when they exchanged hellos in the elevator. She had enjoyed getting that reaction out of him.

It wasn’t often she’d made guys nervous, at least not this kind of nervous.

Rose took Reid by surprise as she picked up the little box of jewelry and pins holding it up to him a thought entering her mind. “Here take one.”

Reid widened his eye his cheeks flushing as he shook his head. “You don’t have to…I mean, they’re yours.”

She shook her head that small smile still on her lips. “It’s overstock…they probably won’t sell since Halloween is over and all….Consider it a late birthday gift…or ya know, just a thanks for always bringing me my mail.”

Reid hoped that his cheeks weren’t flushing once again though he had a feeling they were as he hesitantly reached into the box his eyes spotting something he liked.

He picked the wooden jack-o-lantern pin from the box his thumb running along the detail. He spoke a small smile crossing his lips as he stared down at the pin. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” She replied not moving from beside him as she placed the box back down on the desk.

Reid took a deep breath an idea entering the back of his brain. Should he go for it? Would she say no? Probably, but he wouldn’t know unless he took a chance and asked.

He managed to work the words from his lips. “Do you have plans this Friday?”

Rose widened her eyes a bit shocked by the question, that was bold from someone who had seemed to blush every time she barely glanced his way.

She didn’t have a chance to respond as he spoke again his eyes daring to look up at her his cheeks flushing just as she’d predicted they would. “Because I saw the book on your bookshelf…the Complete Works of Edgar Allan Poe…There’s this Edgar Allan Poe Puppet show…It’s part of this fall festival they’ve got going on right now. It’s only open for one more week…It’s supposed to be fun…I was thinking about going. There’s supposed to be apple cider and other fall snacks. It’s a night thing…so, do you think you might want to go…with me?”

Rose couldn’t stop the small smile from crossing her lips the words leaving her without any hesitation. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

She opened her lips to speak again cringing as her cell phone began to ring. Reid cleared his throat sensing that was his sign to leave, even though he really didn’t want to. “I should get going…I’ll pick up you at five, if that’s alright?”

“That sounds great. I’ll see you then.” She replied reluctantly leading him to the door.

She gave him a small wave Reid’s cheeks still so flushed as she shut the door. He felt the slow smile cross his lips as he headed next door to his own apartment.

He had a date. He was taking Rose Walsh on a date. He widened his eyes a nervous sense of panic hitting him; he had a date with Rose Walsh.


	2. First Date Anxieties

Rose Walsh could admit she felt lost as she stared into her open closet. She felt completely hopeless as she struggled to decide what exactly wear. Getting dressed had never been so difficult before.

Every combination of clothing within her closet just felt wrong at the moment. It wasn’t a feeling she was accustomed to, being so lost when it came to putting together an outfit she felt pretty and confident in. She’d spent years building up her closet with items she adored. She usually had no problem putting an outfit together and pulling it off.

A little voice in the back of her brain quickly pointed out that her current dilemma in picking out an outfit had less to do with having nothing to wear and more to do with the man she was dressing for.

She’d be lying if she tried to pretend that she’d been as cool as cucumber in the days leading up to her date with Dr. Spencer Reid. She’d been quite the opposite actually, on the inside at least.

Rose honestly felt completely lost as she prepared for tonight. She had managed to do her make up at least. She’d decided to forgo the black lipstick choosing instead to go with a deep crimson red. She’d straightened her hair placing a plain velvet headband on, deciding that keeping things simple was ideal. She’d even picked out jewelry that looked perfect for tonight. Four plain silver studs in her ears and a cameo necklace featuring a raven. The necklace was her own design, and it seemed like it’d be perfect for the puppet show Reid was taking her to see.

Rose could admit she was impressed with Reid’s invitation to this fall festival…she’d maybe googled it in the week leading up to the date and she couldn’t help but to look forward to it. It seemed to be more of a carnival than a festival given the Ferris wheel and the few other amusement rides along with the corn maze and the pumpkin patch…it was absolutely something she was sure she’d enjoy.

She was impressed that he’d picked something based off her interests…especially given that he’d been capable of figuring out what her interests might be in less than the hour he’d spent in her apartment.

She wasn’t accustomed to guys putting that kind of effort into a first date. It was kind of sweet to be honest, the fact that he’d picked something so in tune to what she would enjoy. It seemed to match what she’d figured out about Dr. Spencer Reid from the very limited interaction they’d had thus far….he was a sweetheart…most of her dates weren’t sweet.

Most of her first dates involved a bar or if she happened to be dating a wanna be rock star she’d have to put up with sitting around watching her date’s band practice…which was always horribly dull. There was nothing more painful than listening to some guy who thought he was the next Peter Steele…by the time those nights were over she felt like she needed a good drill to the eardrums.

Reid seemed like such a nice guy….She wasn’t accustomed to dating nice guys. To tell the truth most of her ex boyfriends had kind of sucked. They’d been actually pretty awful. She’d dated a lot of jerks; drunk and high guys in rock bands, arrogant goth boys, guys who tended to think of her as more of a cool accessory to have on their arm than an actual person with thoughts, feelings, and opinions beyond the whole goth aesthetic.

She could distinctly remember having a guy she’d dated with all seriousness unironically refer to her as a “big titty goth girlfriend”…needless to say she’d kicked that guy to the curb but not before she had chewed that guy out using more curse words than he’d probably ever heard in his lifetime.

Rose hated to admit that given her experience with first dates so far she’d begun to think that perhaps nice guys were either a rarity or they just flat out didn’t exist. She’d begun to think that perhaps her father had been wrong all along all those times he’d told her bedtime stories telling her she’d find a prince someday. 

To be honest she had never had good luck with boyfriends or first dates…the guys she attracted didn’t tend to be the most thoughtful. They definitely weren’t princes by any stretch of the imagination.

She had plenty of nightmare first dates over the years. There had been the goth guy who had wanted to recite poetry to her in a cemetery…sure it was a creative idea…and she did appreciate the aesthetic of a good cemetery. She liked poetry well enough, but the poetry her date had recited had been melodramatic and honestly cringy. It had been uncomfortable and awkward being sat down to listen to him read from a little book he’d pulled from his jacket pocket. He had been a bit too into listening to himself drone on…he’d definitely been far more into himself than her. Needless to say she’d escaped that date rather quickly pretending she had a family emergency she had to attend to.

Then there had been the guy who had seemed perfectly normal if not a bit moody. She still cringed remembering how moody guy had surprised her by taking her to an S&M club on their first date…that date had ended quicker than she could say the word “latex and whips.” That had been a nightmare, she had no idea why the guy had assumed she’d be into that scene…yeah she did own a collar but that was more for aesthetic than any submissive play….yes, sure a little rough play could be fun, but calling some dude Daddy just gave her the creeps. The closeness she’d had to her own late father, just made that title seem so unsexy. It honestly made her feel sick to relate that word to anything even remotely sexual.

Besides even if she was looking to be kinky, she wasn’t the type to take a guy to bed on the first date.

Then there was the guy in the band who had been a bit too reckless and not to mention drunk to put up with. He'd gotten blackout drunk and angry on their first date. Honestly a night spent dragging her date from getting into a few fist fights had been exhausting. She’d dropped that guy pretty quick and he hadn’t seemed to care given that she had no interest in babysitting him while he drank himself stupid.

The only nice guy she’d gone out with had turned out to just not quite be over his ex…Rose and he had at least still maintained a friendship, but it wasn’t exactly an ideal situation.

So, needless to say she wasn’t accustomed to a guy putting so much thought into a first date…Reid was definitely an outlier as far as her dates went.

He seemed so genuine, that was the best word she could think to describe him. He was a genuinely sweet guy. Not to mention she found it pretty adorable that he seemed so flustered by her.

She hated to admit that these facts made her anxious. She wasn’t use to guys being so nervous around her or just being so genuinely kind to her. Reid’s behavior towards her made it hard to pretend she felt confident around him.

It was easy to pretend to be confident among most people. She was able to put on an act and pretend she was so laid back and aloof.

Reid wasn’t easy to put up an act around.

Rose felt more nervous about tonight than she wanted to admit. She felt so remarkably uncool at the moment.

She was usually able to pretend that she felt relaxed and at ease. She was able to use her appearance as an armor of sorts. Rose knew that her appearance worked in her favor. People assumed she was the mysterious intense quiet type…when in reality she felt awkward and lost.

She knew people might take one look at the way she chose to dress and would assume that she was filled to the brim with confidence. The truth couldn’t be further from this assumption though. To tell the truth she was an awkward dork. She was horribly awkward around most people, she was just really really good at hiding it. She was an absolute dork who just so happened to realize that her aesthetic could work to cover up all the nerdiness.

One date with Reid was somehow undoing all the work she’d done to pretend that she was nothing but cool.

She might have maintained a sense of cool around Reid so far, but the closer their date neared the more anxious she felt.

It wasn’t every single day that a nice guy with a doctorate asked her on a date…not to mention a nice doctor who just so happened to do something within the FBI.

Her past romantic partners weren’t anywhere near as ambitious nor were they as successful as Reid…they also weren’t sweethearts who blushed and turned into flustered messes just from one look from her.

Reid seemed so unlike any guy she’d ever attracted. She almost couldn’t believe he was attracted to her. A cruel little voice in the back of her brain told her that soon enough he’d realize that she wasn’t even his type.

He seemed like he should be taking some librarian out or maybe one of his coworkers…someone who did something more meaningful than work in a bar and make jewelry.

Reid seemed so soft…kind of a giant nerd honestly…He seemed to be sort of sophisticated, it was his clothing Rose thought. He was so prim and proper, he dressed like a gentleman. He dressed like a true academic. He was just so different from the guys who usually showed her interest.

Shouldn’t Reid be dating some soft little blonde thing? Shouldn’t he be dating some nice polite Pollyanna type of girl who wore pastels and hung out in libraries.

Why was he interested in a girl who had dyed her hair black for so long now, that she wasn’t sure if her blonde could ever make a return. She hadn’t worn a pastel since she was ten. She spent her nights pouring drinks. She wasn’t Pollyanna. She wasn’t the blonde bombshell she pictured Reid being interested in. She was more Elvira and Morticia Adams than Pollyanna or Marilyn Monroe.

She took a deep breath telling herself not to be so insecure. Reid seemed to like her exactly as she was…He didn’t seem to be put off by her taxidermy collection or her black lipstick. He seemed genuinely interested in her. So, it did her no good to sit around and think about all the other girls he could be taking out. He was taking her out.

She let out a heavy sigh running her fingers along the variety of dark fabrics within her closet. There had to be something in here that would work.

She was tempted to just go with that bustle skirt she loved, it was one of her favorites after all…but she wasn’t sure this was exactly fall festival friendly. She did own a few pairs of jeans…black of course, but wearing jeans made her feel like she wasn’t really putting an effort into this date. 

Rose felt a small smile cross her lips as she ran her fingers along a dress that just might work well with one of her favorite corsets. The dress was certainly casual enough for a festival and it was dressy enough to look as though she’d put an effort into her look. The dress was a black knee-length thing with quarter length lace sleeves. She could wear the corset over it, it only being an under-bust corset. She’d worn it over dresses before. She was sure she could wear it with some black tights and a pair of plain flat black mary janes.

She could distinctly remember the reaction she’d worked out of Dr. Reid the few times he’d spotted her around the apartment in one of her corsets. She was sure she’d never seen someone blush more.

She did love a good corset, and it did make her figure look pretty amazing. She loved corsets even if she had to put up with emails from her mother containing warnings about just how much “damage” she was doing to her body with the corsets…never mind she didn’t lace them that tight.

Yes, a good corset and this dress would be perfect. Making Reid flustered would definitely work towards erasing some of her own anxieties.

……………………………………………………………………..

Reid had found himself pacing his apartment through out most of the day. He’d woken up early this morning his heart slamming in his chest a nervous energy bustling through him as it hit him just what was happening tonight.

He’d be lying if he tried to pretend that he hadn’t been a nervous wreck all week long. Not going to work had made it all too easy for him to focus on his anxiety. He’d done his best to keep himself busy, reading all his favorite novels and then going to the book store to buy more novels. He’d spent plenty of time at the park playing chess. He’d spent plenty of time at his favorite coffee shop enjoying a pastry with his coffee.

None of these activities kept his mind off his upcoming date though, nor did they help distract him from his worries.

Reid could admit he had spent all week long trying to mentally prep himself for tonight. He’d gone over a million different scenarios in his head of how tonight just might go. It would either be the best night he’d ever dreamed of experiencing, or it would be an absolute failure.

His brain unfortunately seemed to focus on how all the ways he could make tonight the latter.

His brain had cooked up at least a dozen different awful ways he could ruin this date.

He could choke on a candied apple and pass out. He could eat bad carnival food and wind up puking. He could let Rose drag him on some ride that moved far too fast for him and then he’d wind up puking on her. He could say something really stupid and completely offend Rose. He could throw out some statistic that would paint him as an absolute freak that Rose never wanted to see again. He could trip and fall flat on his face dragging her down with him. He could move to kiss her only to wind up somehow blinding her…he wasn’t sure how that scenario would play out…but if there was a will there was a way.

There were so many ways he could screw tonight up. His brain threw one horrible scenario at him after another each scenario getting progressively more ridiculous and unlikely.

He had tried to keep his cool and remind himself that he was working himself up, he couldn’t help it though.

He’d only had one date so far, and it had been horrible. If anything this festival with Rose was more of a first date than what he’d experienced with JJ.

It had been less than a month since he’d taken JJ to that football game. That football game had been an absolute miserable embarrassing failure. JJ hadn’t even realized it was meant to be a date…she’d invited Garcia along after all…turning the would be date into a friendly hangout.

JJ had tried to apologize to Reid of course once it hit her that he meant the football game to be a date, but he’d brushed off her apologies not wanting to make things feel even more awful and awkward. He’d tried to reassure JJ that there were no hard feelings, and that things were still friendly between them. He’d tried to reassure that he still considered her to be a dear friend. He’d tried his best to reassure her that he wasn’t upset or disappointed. 

It had been a terrible experience, but Reid was too good of a person to be bitter over it. He didn’t blame JJ for misunderstanding the entire situation. He wasn’t some jerk that was going to hold some grudge over what an absolute disaster that night had been.

Reid didn’t want to ruin any friendship he’d developed with JJ over a messy misunderstanding or any hurt feelings. That night had at least shown him that JJ and he were meant to just be friends.

If Reid had to be honest when Gideon had first talked him into taking JJ to that football game Reid had hoped that non-date he’d had with JJ would work towards knocking the crush he’d developed on his odd neighbor from his brain…after all he’d been harboring a crush on JJ for a few years before Rose Walsh had entered his life…JJ was the girl he’d secretly admired all these years…he’d been delighted to finally have a date with her.

JJ was the kind of girl he would have crushed on in high school. She was the kind of girl who he would always consider so unattainable.

He had told himself a date with JJ was a dream come true. It was a perfect opportunity to help him move past the silly crush he’d developed on his next door neighbor.

It had failed of course (both the date and the attempt to knock Rose from his mind)…the dream date he’d thought he’d have with JJ was a disaster. Deep down inside there had been a voice in the back of his brain telling him that of course it was a disaster…he wasn’t taking out the girl he’d much rather be out with at that moment.

He felt guilty for feeling that way. He didn’t want to feel as though he was using JJ to forget Rose…but in reality he’d been doing just that.

Reid had hated to admit as the game had worn on he’d much rather be sitting with Rose Walsh.

He didn’t think Rose Walsh would enjoy a football game though…he actually couldn’t imagine her anywhere near a football game.

He couldn’t really picture himself watching another one either to be honest. He’d spent the entire game a little lost…he’d not had the best experience surrounding the sport given most of his childhood bullies had been avid jocks who played football in their spare time. That had been enough to make Reid shy away from the sport.

By the end of that game Reid had realized he and JJ weren’t meant to be. The date had been a failure. It had been a sign that JJ and he weren’t meant to be.

Reid had realized though that he’d much rather keep JJ as a friend than let a disastrous night push her from him forever. He still cared about her. Part of him still had that admiration for her…but as it turns out his heart wanted someone who was so different from JJ.

Reid could admit though, deep down inside he feared that his night with Rose would just be a repeat of what had happened with JJ. He told himself that he was being paranoid. He’d made it pretty clear he considered tonight to be a date when he’d asked Rose to join him.

That didn’t stop Reid from feeling so totally lost though. He could admit he’d debated asking for advice…just like he’d done before that date with JJ. Reid knew he could always call up Gideon or Hotch and ask for some advice.

He wasn’t sure that Rose Walsh was like any girl Hotch or Gideon had ever taken out on a date before.

Besides Reid didn’t want to explain that he was in fact taking his neighbor on a date this soon after the mess of a non-date he’d had with JJ. He couldn’t imagine how awkward that would be, especially if tonight turned out to be a disaster.

He could also admit that the thought of asking Morgan for advice had popped into his brain. Reid was sure that that would only turn out horribly though.

Any advice Morgan would give Reid would probably just result in Rose never speaking to him again…after all wasn’t Morgan the ladies man of the BAU. Reid was sure Morgan preferred one night stands to romantic first dates at the fall festival. 

So, Reid had quickly decided it was best to go in this without any advice from outside sources.

He told himself that the best advice he could follow would be to just be himself. If Rose didn’t like him when he was himself, then it wasn’t meant to be. 

Reid had taken extra care getting ready for this date. He’d taken his time in the shower and had taken his time shaving and even applying an aftershave and a cologne he so rarely wore. It had been a birthday gift from his Aunt Ethel. Reid wasn’t really a big wearer of cologne but he’d not had the heart to tell his aunt that news. He of course had worried that he’d put on too much cologne but had resisted the urge to take soap and scrub some of it off.

Getting dressed had been a bigger ordeal than Reid wanted to admit to. He had found himself staring into his closet for what felt like hours before he’d finally forced himself to settle on an outfit. It was something he’d usually wear to work, brown slacks with a pale long sleeved plaid shirt, one of his favorite ties, and a gray sweater vest…at the end he’d worried that he was overdressed but by the time the thought had entered his mind it was too late to change.

The next ordeal had been the debate over whether he should buy flowers for Rose or not. Roses seemed like the ideal choice, but what if roses were too cliché? She didn’t seem like the kind of girl who would be that impressed with a dozen red roses. He’d debated getting her a single rose, maybe one dyed black…if floral shops did that, he was sure they did…that did seem like something she’d be into…but what if she hated it?

What if she thought roses were some kind of lame play on her first name? If not roses then what though?

He’d felt like an utter moron when he’d realized that the perfect flower had been staring at him the entire time. He’d allowed his mind to drift back to the tattoo on her arm as the answer had hit him…chrysanthemums. A little bouquet of chrysanthemums was the perfect choice.

That was how Reid had found himself standing in front of Rose’s closed apartment door a small bouquet of white and red chrysanthemums in hand his heart slamming in his chest so quickly that he was almost surprised it hadn’t popped out of his chest.

He took a few deep breaths trying to work up his nerve to knock.

He stared down at the flowers praying he’d chosen well. He could admit he’d done his research the night he’d first seen the tattoo on her arm.

He couldn’t help but to want to research it…it was that thirst he had for knowledge.

Reid hadn’t been shocked to find that chrysanthemums actually were considered to symbolize death in some countries. In some countries in Europe chrysanthemums were only used for funerals. In Poland chrysanthemums were placed on the graves of the dead for All Saints day. It made sense for Rose to pick something that had a tie to funeral traditions…she seemed to be interested in that kind of thing judging by some of the books he’d seen at her apartment.

The little florist at the shop he’d bought the bouquet in had told him that white chrysanthemums symbolized honesty and loyalty and that red symbolized a deep passion. He wasn’t quite sure he believed it, and the mention of passion had made his cheeks flush…but Reid still let the florist talk him into adding a few red flowers into the mix.

Reid wasn’t sure what a tattoo of a chrysanthemum was supposed to symbolize though…he guessed that was up to the person who had the tattoo…he wasn’t sure Rose would appreciate him asking her what it symbolized.

He took a deep breath knowing he was stalling. He forced himself to reach up using his fist to give the door a few rapid loud knocks his heart still slamming so fast in his chest.

His heartbeat didn’t slow down as the door opened to reveal her. Rose managed to shoot him a small smile hoping her own anxiety wasn’t written all over her face.

Reid took her in his pulse racing as he spotted what she was wearing. The corset she’d laced over her dress definitely made her figure all the more apparent and it definitely helped make the hint of cleavage her dress showed off far more visible. He swallowed a lump developing in the base of his throat at the sight.

He could remember that first corset he’d spotted her wearing months ago. The reaction it brought out him was the exact same reaction he was experiencing now. He found himself hyper focusing on Rose’s forehead doing all he could to avoid leering at her body.

Reid managed to return the smile she was shooting him knowing he was stuttering over his own words. “I-I,I’m a little early. If you aren’t ready to go, I-I can wait.”

Reid resisted the urge to bury his head in his hands as it hit him that he’d lost the ability to barely even make a coherent sentence. Three PhDs and the sight of her in a corset made him feel like he’d barely finished first grade.

Rose let a small chuckle leave her lips the clear anxiety seeping out of Reid putting her at ease. At least she wasn’t as freaked out as him. It was easier to feel confident around him when he was flustered.

She tried not to smirk eyeing the way he was doing everything he could to avoid staring at her breasts. Score one for the corset.

She spoke thankful she was able to sound far more confident than she felt. “I’m almost ready to go. Just let me grab my coat. Come on in.”

Reid walked into her apartment his palms sweating as she closed the door behind them. She spoke nodding down at the flowers still in his hand not helping but to tease him just the slightest. “Are those for me, or are you just going to carry them all night?”

Reid felt his cheeks flush as he held the bouquet out to her his voice a bit frantic. “I wasn’t sure if you’d like them, but I thought it was a safe bet…given your tattoo and all.”

“It’s a very safe bet. They’re my favorite flower. Thank you, they’re beautiful.” She remarked trying not to chuckle as she noticed that his cheeks flushed all the darker when her hand brushed against his taking the bouquet.

She had to wonder how many times she could make him blush in one night as she watched him squeak out a “you’re welcome.”

Reid took her by surprise staring down at her hands a small frown crossing his features as he noticed that her previous longer nails were now much shorter. “You cut your nails.”

Rose raised an eyebrow surprised that he’d noticed such a minor detail. She let out a small chuckle nodding her head as she explained. “Yeah, I was wearing acrylics before…a friend talked me into them…I only wear them sometimes. They make my life a bit too complicated to wear them for too long though. They really aren’t good for your nails to be honest. So I usually find it easier to keep them on the short side.”

Reid nodded his head the words sliding out of him before he could stop himself. “That’s true…I actually read a health study from Rutgers University that showed that out of the ninety people who were surveyed 52% had experienced fungal infections after visiting nail salons only three times over the course of a year. Tools that aren’t properly cleaned and sanitized can actually lead to exposure to bacteria, fungus, and infections…even Hepatitis B and C.”

He resisted the urge to slam his palm against his face as soon as the words left him…charming bring up fungus and Hepatitis in response to her seemingly innocent comment about her nails.

Rose raised her eyebrow once again a bit taken back by the information dump. Okay, so Dr. Reid was a smart cookie…an odd cookie, but smart none the less.

She couldn’t help but to feel bad for him. The poor guy looked as though he wanted to sink through the floorboards and disappear at the moment.

She gave him a soft smile trying to at least hint that she wasn’t completely grossed out by the information. “Huh, guess it’s a good thing I don’t get the acrylics too often then.”

She spoke again over her shoulder as she headed to the kitchen with the bouquet. “Let me put these in some water and pop on my coat, I’ll just have to grab my purse and then I’ll be ready.”

“Take your time.” Reid blurted out watching her disappear his stomach in knots. She hadn’t run screaming yet…that was a good sign.

His eyes turned down to her cat Bela having taken notice that his new friend had returned to the apartment.

Reid allowed himself to kneel down his hand running along the cat’s back working deep purrs from him. He let himself get lost in how soft Bela’s fur felt the soft strokes calming his racing heart and his twisted gut.

The sense of calm didn’t last long as Reid’s eyes caught sight of her approaching. He stood up knowing his cheeks were flushing as he took in sight of her.

He shifted back in forth doing his best to not throw anymore statistics at her as he spoke. “You look beautiful.”

Rose gave him a soft smile hating to admit that she could feel her own cheeks threatening to flush. Most of her date’s didn’t throw that compliment at her. In fact she could admit that most of her dates didn’t stare at her the way Reid was looking at her right now. Yes there was definitely a hint of lust in his eyes as he let himself occasionally glance down at her cleavage, but there was also a look of awe, as though he was staring at artwork. He was staring at her as though she was made of rubies and pearls.

“Thanks. You don’t look so bad yourself Spencer.” She remarked trying to keep that cool carefree persona she was so accustomed to presenting to everyone.

Rose gave him a soft smile reaching out and running her fingers along the purple scarf he’d draped over his brown coat. She nodded down at it as she spoke “We match.”

Reid furrowed his brow it taking him a moment to realize what she’d meant. The purple velvet coat she wore was the same shade of purple as his scarf. He spoke feeling so unintelligent. “We do.”

Rose apparently didn’t mind his lack of intelligent input as she linked her arm with his fast to speak. “I guess we should get going then.”

……………………………………………….

Reid did his best to keep his eyes on the puppet show though it was hard to focus when he was sitting this close to Rose. There had been no place to sit but on benches that had been set out around the little theater box where the puppet show was taking place.

How was Reid supposed to focus on the rendition of the Raven taking place in front of him when all he could focus on was the smell of her perfume?

She was wearing something different this time around, something new, something spicy that had a hint of violets underneath it there might be a hint of plum there as well. He’d have to be closer to pick up on the latter part of the scent though. The smell seemingly overtook his senses it being far more interesting to focus on than the little Edgar Allan Poe puppet interacting with the raven puppet on the stage in front of him.

At least Rose didn’t seem to be too focused on the fact that he was barely paying attention to the show. He was pleased to see that she seemed enthralled with the puppets.

Reid barely noticed as the puppet show ended his busy brain still trying to detect just what the final part of the scent profile he was picking up off her perfume.

He only noticed that the show had come to an end as Rose moved away from his standing up glancing down at him an amused look in her eyes.

Reid stood up rather quickly hoping it wasn’t obvious he’d been miles away. He spoke swallowing a lump developing in the back of his throat. “Are you hungry?”

“Starved.” Rose replied linking her arm with his once again the action making Reid’s cheeks flush ever so slightly.

He sighed hoping he’d eventually stop having that reaction, unknowing that Rose had to hope he’d keep having that reaction.

Rose raised an eyebrow as he led her to yet another stand that was selling sweet snacks. She’d definitely noticed that Reid seemed to eat more sugar than any human being probably should. She had to wonder how he was so thin when it seemed as though he sucked down sugary treats without a second thought. He must be blessed with a fast metabolism.

She spoke unable to stave off her curiosity as Reid and she walked through the festival grounds Reid and she both snacking on sweet cinnamon cake doughnuts and apple cider. “So what exactly do you do for the FBI?”

“How’d you know I worked for the FBI?” Reid blurted out searching his busy brain trying to figure out if and when he’d ever mentioned his career.

Rose gave him a small grin not helping but to joke. “Maybe I’m a psychic…or I just spotted your ID badge while sharing an elevator with you one day.”

Reid raised an eyebrow tempted to point out to her that the likelihood of someone actually having psychic abilities was highly debatable. He held it in though quickly realizing she was most likely just joking.

Besides didn’t she have a framed drawing of an Ouija board in her apartment. He was sure he’d even spotted a book on palm reading in her bookshelf back at her apartment…she might believe in that kind of thing. It was a realization he was torn about. He was a man of science after all…but then again he did love a good ghost story. He was at least willing to entertain the thought of spiritualism even if deep down he did believe it was most likely bullshit.

He took a deep breath pulling his brain from thoughts of ghosts and psychics realizing he hadn’t answered her question about his job. He was unsure of how she’d react to his career. “I work for the BAU…uh the Behavioral Analysis Unit.”

He paused resisting the urge to go into the entirety of the history of the BAU. The last time he’d done that his audience had been less than impressed.

He took another deep breath as he spoke again. “To put it simply I’m a profiler. I use a mix of psychology and criminology to find people…mostly I use the study of human behavior to help the police find people….as in uh…well people who commit crimes.”

Rose nodded her head getting the hint that he was trying to sugar coat it for her. It was a sweet gesture, but she wasn’t a delicate flower who was going to faint at the mere mention of murder. “People who commit crimes as in serial killers I’m guessing?”

Reid cleared his throat taking a big swig of apple cider as he spoke. “Yes…and uh a couple of other crimes, arsonists, serial rapists, and so on. Usually if a police department needs help they send a case file to our liaison and if she feels that the case needs federal involvement, then we’re called in.”

Rose was surprised that the words left her lips it being a subject she so rarely broached with people, even those who she considered herself close to. “I have some very vague idea of what you do…I’m sort of familiar with some aspects of law enforcement. My father was a cop. I don’t think any cases like what you’re accustomed to dealing with fell on his desk…but I was a kid when he was on the force, so if they did, I probably wasn’t told about it.”

“What’s he do now, is he retired?” Reid asked relieved that at least she didn’t seem to be totally creeped out about the details surrounding his job.

He cringed once again having the desire to disappear as Rose cleared her throat a small frown crossing her features. “He died when I was thirteen…he was killed on the job..shoot out with some drunk asshole who was beating his wife. My dad and his partner were called in and the bastard shot my dad on the spot…guess he wanted to go out in a hail of bullets.”

“I’m sorry.” Reid blurted out unsure of what else he could say, now he’d gone and done it.

His anxiety was quickly quelled as Rose spoke shrugging her shoulders slightly. “It’s okay. You didn’t know.”

She spoke again clearing her throat trying not to focus on her father’s death too much. She was a grown woman and his death had been a decade ago, but it still felt fresh. She wasn’t sure it’d ever stop feeling fresh. “My family is pretty boring aside from my cop father. My mother is a teacher…kindergarten. My sister is a teacher as well…or well she’s planning on being one, once she’s finished up with college…we’re total opposites my mother and sister and I. They’re the blonde homecoming queen types…They still haven’t been able to get over me dyeing my hair.”

“What’s your natural hair color?” Reid dared to ask not helping but to be curious as he gazed at her black hair. He’d wondered if it was her natural hair color, it seemed almost too perfect to be natural.

Rose chuckled not helping but to give his shoulder a playful nudge the action making Reid smile. “Don’t you know it’s impolite to ask a lady her natural hair color?”

She spoke again deciding she might as well admit it. “I’m blonde…but I haven’t been blonde since I was about fifteen. I let a friend dye it for me and my mother lost it when she found out…She actually made me use color corrector from the local supermarket, but lucky for me the black was a little too strong to get rid of. I’ve stuck with black for a while now. I don’t imagine I’ll ever go back to my natural hair color…it’d be too much of a pain to get rid of the black even if I wanted to.”

Reid nodded his head not helping but to be curious. “How long have you been working as a bartender…that’s what you said you do, right?”

Rose let out a small sigh hating that her job wasn’t that impressive. “For about two years now. I work at the Chapel…it’s a goth club…pretty boring to be honest. I mean the appeal of drunk people and loud music kind of loses it’s appeal within a week of tending the bar. I went to school for art, but I dropped out.”

She cringed wishing she didn’t share the final part of that story. She wasn’t sure the guy with the doctorate would be too impressed with an art school dropout.

She was surprised as Reid spoke giving her a small nervous smile. “You still make art though…I mean with the jewelry.”

Rose felt a small smile cross her lips not exactly accustomed to people seeing her jewelry as art instead of a hobby. “I guess that’s true.”

She spoke again before he had time to ask her more about her mother, she wasn’t exactly into getting into her Mommy issues at the moment. “Anyway, I’m from a very small coal mining town in Kentucky that I bet you’ve never even heard of…I didn’t quite fit in back home.”

Reid tilted his head to the side as he took in this information. He took a bit of his doughnut unable to stop himself from saying it. “You don’t have an accent.”

Rose chuckled ever so slightly at this comment. “Yes I do, trust me. It’s faded a bit, but it still comes out on occasion. Just ya know…warning you it might come out. Just don’t call me a Southern Belle and we’ll be good.”

Rose didn’t give Reid the opportunity to respond to this comment as she took him by hand leading him in direction to the Ferris Wheel. “Come on, I do think the Ferris Wheel is calling my name.”

Reid would have turned down the chance to ride it to be honest, if he was alone. He found himself staring down at Rose’s delicate hand holding his and he found himself unable to stop himself from nodding his head. “Okay.”

He had a feeling he’d agree to just about anything right now as long as she kept holding his hand.

The line to the Ferris Wheel was long enough that Reid and Rose finished their snacks thankfully managing to toss their trash in the garbage without losing their spot in line.

Reid had failed to realize of course that being sat in a Ferris Wheel car with Rose only meant that he’d be pressed quite close to her. He wasn’t complaining about the closeness, but he couldn’t ignore the way it made his heart flutter or the way the scent of her perfume enveloped him again.

Rose took notice of his flustered expression not helping but to tease him as she spoke. “You aren’t afraid of heights right? Because if you are you probably should have told me before I drug you over here.”

“Nope, not afraid of heights.” Reid blurted out deciding not to mention that he wasn’t fond of the dark. He wasn’t sure mentioning that he was afraid of the dark at twenty four years old was the most alluring fact to share with a woman who was still holding his hand.

He spoke again unable to stop himself from speaking. “Actually did you know that the top phobia people list having is the fear of flying or Pteromerhanopbia. Right after that is the fear of enclosed spaces, the fear of insects, and the fear of snakes.”

Rose felt a small smile cross her lips once again a bit taken back by Reid’s knowledge. She spoke unable to stop herself from asking. “I’m guessing you know that information thanks to that fancy doctorate you have?”

Reid cleared his throat hoping he wasn’t about to expose himself as being a total freak. “I have three pHds actually….in Mathematics, Engineering, and Chemistry.”

Rose widened her eyes taking in this information, that wasn’t what she’d been expecting to hear. She cleared her throat unable to stop herself from voicing the thought out loud. “I guess you really are a smart cookie.”

Reid felt his cheeks flush shrugging his shoulders as he addressed this comment. “I don’t really think that intelligence can be accurately quantified…I uh, I have an IQ of 187 and an eidetic memory…and I can read 20,000 words per minute.”

Rose resisted the urge to widen her eyes even more sure that they might pop out of her head if she did so. She spoke a small nervous chuckle leaving her. “So, yep…definitely a smart cookie.”

She spoke again not helping but to be curious. “So, you’re like twenty something right? So…you must have zoomed through those doctorates to have three of them.”

“I’m twenty four…I uh, I was in high school by twelve and I started college at fourteen.” Reid admitted having to admit he always hated having this conversation.

It felt too much like he was bragging about his accomplishments. He wasn’t the type to brag. He wasn’t just lying when he said that he didn’t think intelligence could be accurately determined. People were intelligent in different ways. Some people excelled where he failed.

He was surprised as Rose spoke nodding her head slowly saying the last thing he’d expected to hear. “That’s impressive…but it sounds…lonely.”

She paused mentally kicking herself for stating this. She didn’t want to sound as though she was pitying him. She spoke again trying to clear up her statement. “I mean…you were so young…college is a hard enough adjustment on it’s own. I can’t imagine attending college at fourteen…when I was fourteen I still slept with a teddy bear…so I can imagine it was difficult to ya know…function in that environment.

Reid gave her a soft smile a sense of fondness for her, and the concern she felt for him, washing over him. “It was.”

She cleared her throat hoping she was moving on to less awkward conversation. “So, are you from here originally?”

Reid shook his head a small sigh leaving his lips. He knew this would come up eventually. She’d shared details of her childhood with him…he guessed he should share his. “I’m from Vegas.”

He paused hoping that the next words that left his mouth didn’t totally wreck this date, especially when he was stuck in a slowly moving Ferris Wheel unable to escape any discomfort. “My mom still lives there…Uh, that mail of mine you get sometimes…Bennington Sanitarium. She’s been hospitalized there since I was eighteen. She has paranoid schizophrenia. It’s for the best that she’s institutionalized…she can get the help she needs there. I took care of her up until that point…my dad, he uh, well he left…couldn’t deal with her illness and…I don’t know, I guess maybe he was disappointed in how I was or..I don’t know. But, yeah he left when I was about ten. I did what I could for her…but it was rough.”

Rose furrowed her brow at this information and the way Reid was avoiding her glance staring straight ahead a the skyline in front of them as their Ferris wheel car neared the top of the wheel.

Crap, now she’d gone and done it.

She gave his hand a small squeeze struggling to find the words to fix any heartache she may have brought out in him forcing him to admit this all to her. “I’m really sorry Spencer…that, that does sound really rough.”

Reid returned the squeeze to her hand forcing himself to turn to face her hating to see the look of guilt in her eyes. He found himself parroting the very words she’d thrown at him. “It’s okay…you didn’t know.”

He cleared his throat as he spoke again. “I actually write her a letter just about every day…it makes up for me not being able to visit her as often as I should…or at least that’s what I tell myself.”

“I’m sure it helps…I mean she must understand why you’re not around as much as you’d like to be…I’m sure she’s proud of you, with all you’ve accomplished.” Rose tried to reassure him Reid giving her a soft smile though he honestly didn’t quite buy into her statement, it was nice to hear.

He took a deep breath deciding to just come out and say it. “Thanks…you know, for not running from me.”

“Why would I run from you?” Rose blurted out tilting her head to the side a bit thrown off by this statement.

Reid shrugged his shoulders a heavy sigh leaving him. “I figured you’d run once you realized I’m…you know…not normal.”

Rose took him by surprise leaning in and pressing a kiss to his cheek as she spoke. “Normal is pretty overrated Spencer.”

Reid felt his cheeks flush darker than they had all evening as he took in her statement. He turned his head facing her the words sliding from him. “I guess that’s true.”

They stared at one another neither noticing that their Ferris wheel car had finally reached the top of the wheel.

Reid felt his pulse race as Rose did the one thing she so rarely found herself ever having the desire to do on a first date. She leaned in closer to him her lips brushing against his so lightly just barely testing the waters.

Reid felt his cheeks flush all the more feeling a bit clueless as what to do as he felt his lips against hers. He’d never really been kissed before, aside from an older girl who had given him a pity kiss back when he’d been a sixteen year old in college and she’d realized he’d never been kissed before.

This was definitely no pity kiss.

Reid closed his eyes deciding his best bet was just to go with what felt right. He placed a hand against her cheek hoping his palms weren’t too sweaty as he moved his lips against hers the best he could hoping he wasn’t just being a drooling awkward mess.

Rose managed to dominate the kiss gently coaxing his mouth open Reid getting the hint as her tongue slid across his. He couldn’t stop the moan from leaving him as he enthusiastically allowed his tongue to slide against hers the kiss growing more intense. He smiled into the kiss overwhelmed by how soft her lips felt against his how good it felt to deepen the kiss. He felt so pleased as he worked a soft moan from her. 

Rose placed her own hand against his cheek the kisses taking her breath away. She wasn’t sure she’d ever been kissed like this before. Reid tasted so sweet. It had to be all that sugar he'd eaten tonight...or maybe it was just that he was such a sweetheart that he had to taste sweet.

Neither wanted the kiss to end but the need for oxygen out ruled the desire to continue Reid and Rose’s lips parting Reid and she daring to open their eyes staring at one another their cheeks both flushed from more than any anxiety.

Rose couldn’t stop the small laugh from leaving her as she noticed a trace of her crimson lipstick staining Reid’s lips. She used her thumb gently wiping it from him Reid allowing a laugh to leave him as well as she held a thumb up showing the evidence of their kiss.

He felt the words leave him a bit surprised by the confidence he felt as the comment left him. “I wonder if the black lipstick will do that.”

Rose chuckled at this shaking her head slightly not helping but to tease him. “Bold of you to assume there’s more kisses in your future.”

Reid felt the smile cross his lips recalling her joke earlier. “You did say you might be psychic…so do you see any in my future?”

Rose smiled at this comment a bit amused he remembered the comment. She pressed another kiss to his cheek as she spoke. “Perhaps…I may see another one happening tonight…ya know…if you ride this Ferris Wheel with me one more time.”

Reid worked up the nerve to wrap an arm around her shoulders working up the nerve to pull her a little closer to him as he spoke. “I can make that happen.”

Rose couldn’t wipe the smile from her lips unable to stop herself from resting her head against his chest as he snuggled her close to him.

She stared out at the skyline as the Ferris Wheel car lowered all the more. She felt her heart flutter in a way it had never done around a guy before. She wasn’t sure what washed over her…she’d never really gone for a kiss to the lips on a first date.

Spencer Reid was so different though…deep down she knew that Spencer Reid was downright dangerous. He was making her drop so many of her own rules. He was dangerous and she didn’t care. She could definitely see herself falling for Dr. Spencer Reid.

Reid felt his own smile cross his lips as he held her against him allowing himself to enjoy the view of the skyline and the feel of the girl in his arms. He could absolutely see himself falling for Rose Walsh even harder than he already had.

He knew he’d ride this Ferris Wheel as many times as she wanted, especially if there were a few more kisses in his future.


	3. Not even a chapter sorry not sorry. Just a note about something that is bothering me.

Just an authors note: I don't mean to sound like a total ahole or like I'm whining (I know ao3 doesn't have the best inbox system)...but I feel like it needs to be said. Can we please reserve my comment section for comments that are relevant to my works...I don't really want to sound like I'm dictating things or being ungrateful but I just find it a little disheartening to have that space that I prefer to use for feedback or comments on my fics used for something that really isn't about the fic at all. I don't want to be that person, but I feel like it should be said. Just saying, it can get a little annoying just as a writer to see it.


	4. Thanks For Being You

Rose resisted the urge to roll her eyes as she watched her friend suck down the rest of the cherry wine from her glass. Cara had sucked down most of the bottle all on her own all by herself. No it wasn’t as though it was expensive wine…it was only twelve bucks without the tax, but still…Rose had been the one who’d bought it, and it was Rose’s favorite. It was imported from Poland and she always tried to have a few bottles in the house. She’d only had a glass and a half so far.

She knew she should be accustomed to Cara being a lush by now…the girl could drink. It had been fun at one point in Rose’s life, when she’d first begun hanging out with Cara back when she was nineteen and using a fake id to get into clubs…now though that Rose was getting closer and closer to her mid twenties and growing sick of the party scene Cara’s antics were getting old fast.

Cara ran a hand through her long purple hued hair as she stood up from Rose’s sofa helping herself to Rose’s kitchenette and her liquor collection.

Rose bit her cheek fighting the urge to stop her. She took a deep breath hating that she didn’t have the balls to speak up. She knew it was pathetic…she had a tendency to let some of her friends walk all over her….Cara was the main offender. It was just that Rose had never had many friends…so when she’d moved to DC and found a group of friends she’d finally felt as though she had found her tribe so to speak. Rose had been accustomed to being the odd man out back in her hometown. No one got her interests or her sense of style back home..so when she’d come to the capital city and had met people who liked the same things she did it had felt like a blessing.

Maybe that was why it had been so hard to speak up and stand up for herself when Cara clearly took advantage of her at times like this. Rose knew Cara wasn’t the only one of her friends who took advantage of her…but she had grown accustomed to telling herself that it was better to have friends who maybe occasionally took advantage of her than to be all alone in the world.

At least Cara was reaching for a cheaper bottle of whiskey and not the other bottle of cherry wine or even Rose’s more treasured bottle of plum wine. Cara hummed to herself as she helped herself to Rose’s fridge grabbing a soda to chase the booze with.

Cara spoke as she dropped back down on the sofa thankfully somehow not spilling her overfilled shot glass nor dropping the bottle or the can of coke. “So, have you thought about it?”

Rose took a slow sip of her wine resisting the urge to cringe. She’d hoped Cara would have drank enough to forget this whole conversation Rose had been trying to avoid all night. She lowered her glass ignoring Cara’s expectant stare. “I really don’t think that it’s a good idea?”

“Why not? I is it cause of Julian. I mean, I know the dude has it bad for you, but I told him to stop being such a jackass. He won’t make his move, so he has no right to be pissed if I set you up on a date.” Cara blurted out taking a healthy swig of coke after she threw back a shot.

Rose rolled her eyes at the thought of Julian. He was one of her friends…though most of the time Rose felt as though their relationship bordered on being antagonistic. He did obviously have a thing for Rose, but as Cara had pointed out he refused to do anything about it. Every single time Rose went out with another guy Julian had a bitch-fit and acted like a total jackass about it. He’d get all haughty when he found out Rose had a date and then she’d have to put up with him being snippy for weeks on end until he got a grip.

He was a man-child really. It was a total turn off. If Rose had ever had any interest in him, his entire attitude when the opposite sex gave her attention would have killed that crush so fast.

She shrugged her shoulders her brain screaming at her to admit the truth. She held it in instead bringing up the other reason she had to resist Cara’s attempts to hook her up with some guy. “Julian is a dumbass. I don’t care what he thinks about who I choose to date. Trust me, he’s not what’s stopping me. It’s just, the last time you set me up was a mess. No offense, but I just don’t think the guys you pick for me are really my type. I mean that last guy…he was a total creep.”

“I know Mac was a weirdo. I didn’t think he’d drop the bondage thing on you like that. I swear I had no idea he was going to take you to an S&M club on the first date. He feels really bad about it, if it’s any consolation. He just thought you were into that kind of thing. I mean you seemed pretty interesting to him when you first met…you were wearing that vinyl thing, so he really thought you’d like it.” Cara insisted taking another shot.

Rose let out a huff wanting to snap back ‘what gave him the impression that I’d be into that? Just because I wore a vinyl skirt at work because we were doing a theme night doesn’t mean I’m into bondage. I didn’t even own that stupid skirt. I borrowed it from a friend for that one work event. It was super gross and uncool to drop that shit on me on our first date. He disgusts me, I can’t even believe you’re defending him.’

She held it in though taking a deep breath. Cara spoke again still so committed to this new guy she was convinced would be a great date. “I swear this guy is awesome. Ross is such a chill dude. He works at the parlor where I got my ink touched up and he’s a total catch. You’re so his type. I bet you’d like him. And a nice bonus of dating a guy who works at a tattoo parlor is you might get free service.”

Rose took another deep breath knowing that she had choice but to be blunt about it. If she didn’t admit the truth then Cara would never let this go or worst she’d just spring the date on her without Rose’s permission. “I don’t really want more tattoos at the moment….I really can’t go out with him, I’m sorry…I’m kind of already seeing someone.”

“Since when? Is it that drummer guy that was hitting on you at work the other night? I noticed him hovering around you when his band finished their set the other night.” Cara blurted out a frown crossing her features as she searched her brain for just who Rose’s mystery date could be.

Rose couldn’t stop herself from scrunching her nose at the mention of this drummer Cara was mentioning. “No, that guy was drunk and kind of smelled like sweat and puke…I mean, he was hitting on me, but I don’t flirt on the clock. I just refilled his drink and sent him on his way while I got back to work.”

She paused taking a sip from her wine glass as she allowed herself to speak again. “You don’t know the guy I’ve been seeing, trust me. He’s one of my neighbors.”

Cara frowned silently trying to picture all of Y/N’s neighbors she’d seen around the complex. The only neighbor she could clearly remember was the old lady across the hall. Rose occasionally helped carry the old woman’s groceries and she was always quick to say hi to Rose and glare at Cara…Cara had a feeling the old broad didn’t approve of her piercings nor her multitude of tattoos.

Cara took another shot Rose resisting the urge to drop her jaw as Cara spoke. “So is it official with this neighbor, because I mean. If it’s not official then you’re allowed to date around. You know that right? If a guy doesn’t make shit official you can play the field.”

Rose bit at the inside of her cheek as she rolled the comment around in her brain. Reid and she hadn’t exactly had the discussion about what this was between them. She got the feeling that Reid wasn’t seeing anyone else but her.

They’d been out on several dates thus far.

For their second date he’d taken her to a foreign film festival where they’d been showing a live action production of The Little Mermaid in Russian. The film had subtitles thankfully. Rose didn’t speak a word of Russian but it seemed that Reid did since he’d whispered a few corrections to her that the subtitles had apparently misinterpreted. The film had been enjoyable. The film had stuck to the original telling of the fairy tale which had a more tragic ending than Disney would have ever dreamed of giving it. During the film Rose could admit she’d felt her heart sing as Reid had finally worked up the nerve to slide his hand across the arm rest between them clasping her hand in his. It had taken him until halfway through the film to do it. It seemed that Reid had realized after their hands had kept brushing against one another while sharing a bag of popcorn, that perhaps holding her hand wasn’t such a big risk. After the film he’d taken her to dinner at an Indian restaurant near their apartment complex. Once dinner was over they’d gone to a 24 hr diner and they’d stayed far too late enjoying coffee, dessert, and each other. They’d ended the night with more than a few kisses before they parted ways at her front door.

On their third date Rose had surprised Reid with a weekend picnic lunch date at the park. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom and it was a nice day so it seemed like a perfect plan. She knew they’d looked odd walking with her arm linked in his a black lace parasol over her head to protect her from the sunny day and an equally black lacy dress adorning her figure. Reid had looked as though he should be visiting a library in his brown corduroy slacks and a red sweater that he must have thrifted as it was far too large for his thin frame. Reid hadn’t seemed to mind the occasional stare they’d gained from the other patrons at the park though as he carried their picnic basket and found a nice place to sit underneath the cherry blossom trees. They’d sat near the chess tables and Reid had taught her about the game as they watched people play. On that date Reid had discovered that Rose’s black lipstick did in fact smudge against his lips just as well as the crimson lipstick had.

Reid’s work schedule combined with Rose’s odd hours at the club of course had interfered with them having too many official dates beyond this though. Rose hadn’t minded though. When they didn’t have work they’d spent every second they could together even if it meant just relaxing on her sofa and enjoying take out.

Reid had made an effort to text her daily while they were apart. It was kind of sweet. He called her too of course when work wasn’t too hectic and he had some privacy, but he did at least text her goodnight each night while he was away on a case.

He’d admitted that he wasn’t too fond of texting, but he was willing to try as long as she didn’t mind how long it took him to type out responses on his flip phone. Rose was patient easily realizing that Reid didn’t seem to be too into technology. Her phone seemed to be a bit better than his, or at least easier to text on. The newer t-mobile sidekick phone she owned did have a sliding keyboard to type on after all. Reid’s flip phone meant that he had to click buttons a million times to spell out his words which meant that some of the texts she got were a bit of a mess. She definitely had a feeling Reid wasn’t that technologically savvy.

As if on cue her cell phone chimed Rose reaching down to pick it up unable to stop the smile from crossing her lips as she read the text.

Reid: ‘Just got back in to Quantico. Jet landed 30 minutes ago. Are you still awake?’

She ignored Cara’s attempts to lean in and read her text message as Rose slid the keyboard down typing out a fast message.

Rose: ‘I’m awake, what’s up?’

She continued to ignore Cara’s curious gaze as she awaited Reid’s response. She wasn’t shocked it seemed to be taking him a while as usual.

Rose let out a small sigh as Cara spoke nodding down at the phone. “So, I’m guessing that’s him?”

“Yep.” Rose replied holding her phone face down on her lap keeping a tight grip on it so that Cara couldn’t snatch it away and read anything. Not that there was anything scandalous, but she didn’t feel comfortable with her friend reading her messages still.

Cara spoke nodding down at the cell phone. “And I’m guessing by how quick you replied to that message that you’re serious about him?”

Rose let out a small sigh knowing her answer would lead to more questions. She couldn’t force herself to deny the truth though. “Yes I am.”

“What’s he like?” Cara asked not shocking Rose by the question.

Rose bit at the inside of her cheek trying to be as vague as possible. “He works for the federal government. He’s a pretty quiet guy…he keeps to himself most of the time. I don’t think he really gets out much. He’s kind of an introvert.”

Cara raised her eyebrows not missing the chance to stare at Rose as though she’d sprouted another head. “Really the government?”

Rose rolled her eyes slightly as she replied. “Yeah, I mean we live in Washington DC. Most of the people around here work for the government in some shape or form.”

“Most of the people we hang out with don’t though…just how old is this guy? I mean what exactly does he do? Please tell me he’s not some lobbyist or political aid or something really gross and boring.” Cara asked not surprising Rose by how nosy she was being.

Rose took a hefty swig of her wine finishing it off as she explained still trying to be vague. It wasn’t that she was ashamed of Reid…it was just that she knew Cara could be judgmental and knowing too many details about Reid’s career would just cause Cara to ask just how he’d gotten such a prestigious position at his age…which would lead to Rose having to explain Reid’s IQ. It really didn’t feel like it was Rose’s place to share that detail about him. “He’s twenty five and nope he’s not into the political thing.”

She took a deep breath deciding that it was best to just be honest about what she felt for him at the least. It might get Cara to back off just a bit. “I really like him. I think it’s getting pretty serious. I have no desire to see anyone else and I know he’s not seeing anyone else…so yeah, things are getting serious between us.”

“Do I at least get to know his name?” Cara asked not hiding the annoyance in her voice at the realization that Rose was clearly not going to in the position to be set up on anymore dates by Cara.

To be honest Rose had the distinct feeling Cara had been so into this newest tattoo guy because she had a feeling that if Rose was dating a tattoo artist that meant discounts for Cara. Cara could be a bit selfish honestly…Cara tended to be focused on her wants and needs. It felt like Cara never really did anything unless she felt it might benefit her in some shape or form. Rose once again had to question why she hadn’t ditched Cara? Why was she so worried about being alone with friends like these, Rose had to wonder.

Rose took a deep breath trying to hide her annoyance as she spoke. “His name is Spencer Reid.”

Rose was relieved when her cell phone chimed she lifting it up still hiding the screen from Cara’s view as she read the message.

Reid: ‘Rough case. I know it’s late, but can I please see you?’

She felt her heart clinch at the comment about the rough case. Reid hadn’t been too eager to share too many details about his job. Rose had a feeling he wanted to protect her from some of the darkness that came along with the things he’d been exposed to. Or at least that was the impression she got from how vague he was when it came to giving her too many details about the cases he’d worked.

He had mentioned soon after their first date that he had been on a mandatory leave from his work for a few weeks due to some events with a case. It was standard procedure. It was nothing he’d done wrong, he’d insisted to her. He had seemed unwilling to open up too much, but Rose could guess those events might have been pretty awful if it meant being on leave. She just had to trust that he’d open up to her when he was ready. For now all she could do was comfort him the best she could and let him know she was there to listen.

She typed a fast reply not even second guessing her reply.

Rose: ‘It’s not too late. Come on by.’

She quickly typed another little message trying to at least provide some comfort for him through whatever might be happening in his head at the moment.

She typed a simple line of: <3 <3 <3 <3.

She cringed as Cara apparently managed to catch sight of the two lines of text on Rose’s end not above speaking up. “Are you trying to arrange to have a booty call or something over there?”

Rose cleared her throat her cheeks flushing causing Cara to chuckle. “Come on, I know you aren’t a virgin. If you want me to leave so you can get some government owned dick I’ll go.”

“It’s not like that. He just had a rough time at work. He just got back in town from a trip to Maryland for work and he probably needs to vent about it. He has a pretty stressful job.” Rose replied her cheeks still flushed Cara smirking fast to reply.

“So, you’re gonna comfort him with your vagina?”

Rose groaned sending Cara a glare the woman too busy laughing at her own joke. The woman spoke still laughing. “I might actually stick around. I want to meet his guy since you won’t tell me anything about him. I want to know what the guy you’re about to ride out looks like. I gotta make sure he plans on wrapping it before he taps it.”

Rose was tempted to admit the truth…that Reid and she hadn’t gotten anywhere near taking things to that level yet. Rose knew that wasn’t a can of worms she wanted to open though.

Admitting the truth might mean admitting that she had suspicions that Reid was pretty inexperienced…at least he seemed kind of clueless judging by how anxious he’d seemed that first time they’d kissed and how slow he’d been taking things since then. The last thing she wanted to do was give Cara ammunition to taunt her more.

Rose would be lying if she tried to pretend that she didn’t want to go a little further with Reid. When he kissed her goodbye on that last date they’d had, it took everything in her to stop herself from dragging him into her apartment and at least asking to fool around a little.

She had quickly realized that Reid’s lack of experience might be tied to the life he’d lived so far. He’d already admitted to her just how young he’d been when he’d graduated from high school and then college. She imagined it hadn’t left much room for social development for him. So it made sense that he seemed a little lost when it came to doing more than kissing her.

Rose could admit it was a bit of a change, being the more experienced one in the relationship for once. It didn’t exactly reflect her past relationships where she dated guys who seemed frustrated when she wanted to slow down.

She knew that this was part of why it was important to let Reid make the first moves when it came to the more intimate aspect of their relationship thus far.

She stood up taking her glass with her heading to the kitchen to refill it ignoring Cara’s amused chuckles the girl still clearly pleased with herself over her jokes.

Cara spoke from her spot on the sofa amusement still clear in her voice. “Are you pissed off?”

Rose resisted the urge to admit that she was pretty pissed off. She took a deep breath taking a sip of wine before she spoke. “Not pissed, just unamused.”

Cara let out a huff Rose cringing ready to be told to ‘lighten up’ she’d heard it before. She took another sip of wine as Cara spoke saying just what she predicted. “I’m just joking Rose. There’s no need to be so sensitive about it.”

“I think I’m allowed to be sensitive about my sex life.” Rose remarked daring to somewhat stand up for herself.

Cara let out another huff as she spoke. “It’s 2005 Rosie. We’re allowed to talk about sex. The whole feminist movement and the sexual revolution kind of opened the door to women being allowed to talk frankly about sex. There’s no shame in hooking up with a guy. I’m not trying to hurt your feelings and I’m sorry if you feel that way.”

Rose bit the inside of her cheek tempted to point out that ‘I’m sorry if you feel that way’ wasn’t a real apology. She hated fake apologies. When some said ‘I’m sorry you feel that way.’ or ‘I’m sorry if I hurt you.’ that wasn’t a sincere apology. It was just deflecting a wrong doing off of themselves. It was empty and lazy to say those phrases.

She held back the need to point out that she hated being called ‘Rosie’. Her father was the only one who called her Rosie.

She spoke up her voice clipped “Can we just drop it.”

“Fine by me.” Cara remarked yet another huff leaving her lips as she slurped down the remainder of the coke in her can.

The two women remained silent for a long while Cara finally being the one who broke the silence. “You seriously like this guy though?”

Rose took another drink fighting the urge to slam her head against the counter top. Hadn’t she already explained that she liked him?

“Yeah I really really do like him. He’s a great guy. He makes me happy.”

Cara didn’t have a chance to push it as a soft knock sounded at Rose’s front door.

Rose moved fast quick to answer it ignoring Cara looming in the background. Rose stared up at Reid the poor guy looking worn down. The dark circles under his eyes seemed to be more prominent and the small smile he tried to paste on his face didn’t exactly meet his eyes.

Rose wordlessly welcomed him into her apartment shutting the door behind him. Rose leaned up the best she could embracing Reid her lips pressing to his cheek.

Reid gently placed his hands at her waist his cheeks flushing slightly as he realized just what Rose was wearing. She was wearing part of her usual choice in sleepwear which seemed to be black leggings. It was what she had on top that made Reid’s blood rush. The black cami she wore clearly showed off her body. It fit tight across her chest and was made of a soft cotton though the lace trim along the bottom and the straps did give it a seductive flair. The material covered pretty much anything that might be too scandalous but it didn’t hide a healthy view of cleavage. Reid was sure if he slid his hands underneath the loose black cardigan she wore he’d be able to feel the hint of her bare waist that peaked out under the top.

He hoped his flushed cheeks weren’t noticeable as she pulled back from him. He spoke clearing his throat trying to pretend that he wasn’t so eager to stare down her top though he couldn’t stop himself from peeking at least once the sight making him feel dizzy in the best way possible.

He forced himself to focus on her eyes as he spoke. “I’m sorry it’s so late. I just, it’s been rough. I wanted to see you. All I could think about the entire flight home, was seeing you, actually.”

Rose gave him a small smile her heart fluttering and clinching at the realization that he wanted to see her. She hated that he was clearly having a bad time, but he had to like that he’d sought her out instead of heading next door to his own apartment. “It’s fine. I told you it’s not too late.”

Cara stepped forward interrupting the moment not above staring at Reid before sending Rose a look of ‘are you serious?? The guy’s wearing a sweater vest. He looks like a total dork. Is he seriously your type?’ “Aren’t you going to introduce me?”

Rose sighed hoping Cara would leave soon. “Spencer, this is Cara… Cara this is Spencer.”

Reid gave a nervous wave his cheeks flushing all the darker as the woman stared up at him that look of scrutinizing disbelief still etched onto her features.

“I didn’t know you had company.” Reid blurted out trying to break the moment of awkward silence.

Rose was fast to speak heading to the sofa and grabbing Cara’s purse practically shoving it at her. “She was just leaving actually. She has work tomorrow morning, and it’s getting late.”

Cara raised an eyebrow clearly debating purposely sticking around just to irk Rose. She held back though heading towards the door but not before turning and sending Reid a cool smile. “So I’m guessing since you’re Rose’s new main squeeze you’re going to be joining us for Nikki’s birthday next weekend?”

Reid furrowed his brow sending Rose a confused glance unsure of how to respond to this. A little voice in the back of his head told him to panic. Were Rose and he even at the point where they met each other’s friends? This Cara girl seemed pretty intimidating. If she was any indication to what Rose’s other friends were like, who was to say they’d ever want Reid around. A cruel voice in the back of Reid’s brain told him Rose wouldn’t want him to meet her friends. He had never fit in with anyone and he wasn’t about to start fitting in now. He was strange, and nervous, and lame. Why would Rose’s friends want him around?

Rose found herself just as panicked. Her friends could be a lot…and Nikki’s birthday was taking place at the club…Rose wasn’t entirely thrilled to be hitting her workplace on night off, but Nikki wanted the party there. The Chapel could be loud and hectic at best. The Chapel really didn’t seem to be like it’d be Reid’s scene. Nikki also wanted to hit Club Necropolis which definitely wasn’t anywhere Reid would want to hang out. To be honest the longer Rose spent working there the less she enjoyed the place.

She spotted the fact that Reid was at a loss for words he not answering this question. She could see Cara’s smirk the girl clearly sensing she’d shoved Rose into making a choice. Cara was testing her, seeing just how serious Rose was about Reid. This was a power move on Cara’s half. This was how their friendship seemed to work, it was an endless struggle for power.

Rose tilted her head up as she spoke taking back the control, pulling a power move of her own. “I haven’t had a chance to ask him yet. Spence, do you have plans next weekend? My friend is having a birthday party, would you like to come with me?”

Reid took a deep breath that mean voice in the back of his head growing fainter. She was asking him. She wanted him there. She seemed to want him there at least. “I mean…if work doesn’t keep me away, then no I don’t have plans. I’d like to come.”

Rose sent him a reassuring smile though her stomach was in knots realizing what she’d just signed the poor guy and herself up for. She managed to hide her anxiety shooting Cara a calm smile. “We’ll see you there then. Drive home safe.”

And with that she managed to make Cara disappear from the place but not before Cara shot Reid another look that clearly read she was unimpressed.

Rose shut the door behind her tempted to lock it tight…just in case.

She was relieved that if Reid noticed the awkward power struggle between Rose and Cara that he didn’t seem to want to mention it.

Instead he spoke giving her a sheepish smile. “I didn’t know you had company.”

“It’s fine, like I said she was leaving.” Rose insisted hoping he’d drop it soon. The last thing she wanted to do was have to explain the hostility between her and her so called friend.

Reid cleared his throat a small frown crossing his features as he dropped his messengers bag on a living chair. He watched Rose clear the table of the mess Cara had left behind as he debated bringing up the tension he’d seen between Rose and her friend.

He held in the desire to question her about it knowing that profiling the woman he was dating probably wasn’t advisable. “I hope I didn’t interrupt any plans you had with her.”

Rose gave him a tight smile as she headed towards the kitchenette dropping dirty dishes into the sink and placing her whiskey back where it belonged. “No, you didn’t interrupt a thing. You showing up was kind of a blessing. It stopped her from completely cleaning out my liquor collection.”

She spoke again before he had any chance to even mention the obvious animosity lingering under the surface between Cara and her. “Speaking of liquor, can I get you something to drink?”

Reid sat down on her sofa the words falling from his lips not wanting to be any trouble. “Water is fine.”

Rose let out a soft laugh the sound heavenly to Reid’s ears. “You’re dating a bartender and you ask her for only a water? You said you had a rough case, are you sure you don’t want something stronger?”

Reid resisted the urge to point out that alcohol was a depressant and would only serve to make feelings of sorrow seem more intense. He had a feeling Rose wasn’t searching for a lecture.

He took a deep breath choosing another response instead. “Surprise me with the drink.”

Rose spoke up as she began to gather supplies from her kitchen not helping but to ask wanting to be a good hostess. “What about food? Have you eaten yet?”

Reid furrowed his brow wanting to refuse her offer. He’d had a small snack on the jet. He’d be fine really. His grumbling stomach betrayed him though making it obvious just how starved he really was. He spoke having the feeling Rose had heard his stomach growling. “I could use a bite to eat.”

She nodded her head making her way over to her fridge. “I would give you my leftovers from dinner, but I had spinach in my pasta and I already know you hate it.”

Reid gave her a sheepish smile remembering how he’d been unable to hide the grimace on his face as she’d ordered palak paneer on their second date. He’d had to admit that though he wasn’t the world’s pickiest eater, spinach was by far his least favorite food on the planet.

Rose spoke again finally locating what she was searching for in her fridge. “Lucky for you though I’ve been told I make a pretty great turkey melt.”

Reid smiled the words falling from him as he allowed himself to sink further into her sofa it far more comfortable than it had any right to be. It was way more comfortable than the leather sofa in his apartment that he’d bought from a thrift shop. Though he was sure Rose’s sofa also came from a thrift shop, it was far cushier.

He felt his smile grow all the more as Rose’s cat came trotting into the room Bela making a beeline for Reid. The cat happily settled into Reid’s lap Reid reaching down to stroke the black cat’s silky fur.

The cat purred as it practically sank into Reid’s lap. Reid allowed his mind to wonder as he focused on petting the animal. He’d never really considered himself to be a cat person…or an animal person for that matter. After all his coworkers did have a running joke about the ‘Reid Effect’ and how both children and dogs tended to react negatively to Reid. Reid could admit he was a bit wary around most animals.

Dogs seemed so loud and so demanding of attention. They jumped and barked and made Reid feel uneasy. He’d never really been around many cats. There had been a few stray cats in his childhood neighborhood back in Vegas, but Reid had never really paid them much attention. He’d worried that a cat would be bound to scratch or bite. Reid had never had the opportunity to own a pet. Pets weren’t really something that would have been reasonable given his home environment as a child. His mother wasn’t capable of caring for a pet and Reid was too busy caring for his mother to add on another responsibility.

Reid had read a few case studies that showed people who owned pets felt tended to cope better with life’s stressors. Reid hadn’t really understood how that could be true. After all didn’t pets mean more responsibility. The responsibility of owning a pet seemed more like it would contribute to stress than reduce it.

As he sat and stroked Bela’s fur though, Reid realized just how beneficial having a pet could be to one’s state of mind.

It was easy to focus on the cat the action of petting him repetitive enough that it dulled his anxiety just the slightest.

This was exactly what he’d needed he realized; being in Rose’s apartment after everything he’d experienced this past week.

He could smell the scent of lemon grass hanging in the air from the incense Rose had lit earlier. The smell made him feel all the more relaxed.

He allowed his eyes to gaze over the living area always feeling as though he noticed something brand new each time he visited Rose’s apartment. Though he’d only stepped foot in her apartment a total of four times so far, and that included his first two visits to the space when he’d asked Rose out and when he’d taken her on their first date.

He had to wonder if perhaps the items he noticed weren’t brand new at all and that the area was just so cluttered that he couldn’t take it all in at once. Rose had admitted to Reid that she’d actually put a lot of effort into making her apartment reflect her style. She’d seemed proud of the space, and Reid had found he enjoyed it simply because it truly did reflect the Rose he was getting to know.

Most of her items in Rose’s apartment had been thrift and yard sale finds, though she tended to redesign the items; painting wooden furniture black and refurbishing some of the cushions with new fabric.

Her taste in décor was a bit on the kookier side of the coin. She’d confessed to him that she’d been known to buy Halloween décor for use as household décor. Some of her artwork had been gifted from friends or bought online from independent artists.

Reid had realized that she seemed to like candles given the abundance of black and purple candles around her living area.

The crystals had been bought simply because Rose found them pretty. The taxidermy had been her grandfather’s Rose had explained to him. She was fascinated by taxidermy, but found the idea of actually trying it made her squeamish. Despite her more morbid interest in the subject Rose had admitted to being a little antsy at the actual process of creating the taxidermy pieces.

Reid could admit given Rose’s interest in taxidermy he had debated seeing if Gideon might be willing to put him in contact with Gideon’s connection at the Smithsonian…Reid could admit he’d entertained the idea of seeing if this connection would be willing to allow Reid and Rose a more private tour of the taxidermy collection.

Reid was pretty sure Gideon could pull a few strings and make it happen for him, but he held back the desire to ask his mentor for the favor.

Reid could admit he maybe wanted to keep Rose to himself, just for a little while…it was nice to have something or more accurately someone outside of work. He wanted to keep Rose to himself for just a little while longer.

He’d introduce her to his colleagues eventually, for now though it felt good to have his private life to himself, safe from his fellow profilers.

He had a feeling of course everyone knew something was up…he hadn’t been discreet about texting Rose, nor had he been able to hide the love-struck smile that had crossed his lips each time her name flashed across his cell signaling another text. So far though Reid had managed to brush off the curious gazes of his coworkers…for now at least.

Reid tore his eyes from Rose’s taxidermy collection as her voice sounded out she holding out a plate and glass to him as she spoke. “I’ll trade you food and drink for a cat.”

Reid managed to give her a small smile as she placed the food and drink on the coffee table in front of him taking her cat from him.

She spoke as she dropped down on the sofa beside him keeping a grip on the cat stopping him from wandering back into Reid’s lap. “Trust me, he’ll eat off your plate if I let him and then he’ll puke all night.”

Reid resisted the urge to scrunch his nose up at the thought trying not to think about cat vomit as he leaned forward digging into the food suddenly realizing just how starved he’d really been. Rose was right, she did make a good turkey melt.

He had a feeling he’d probably finish his food embarrassingly too quickly, but he hadn’t really thought to actually eat anything on the jet back to Quantico other than a handful of almonds. He was embarrassed to admit that if he hadn’t stopped by Rose’s apartment he most likely would have gone next door to his own apartment and barely managed to have a bowl of canned soup or whatever leftovers might still be lingering in his fridge. If those muffins he’d bought the week before were still good, he’d probably just eat a chocolate chip muffin for dinner…or maybe a poptart. He wasn’t always the best at self care when it came to feeding himself after coming home from stressful cases.

Reid stared down at the cup a small frown crossing his brow as he stared down at the thick looking orange liquid. Rose spotted the look a small chuckle leaving her as she spoke. “Trust me I’m a bartender. You won’t hate it.”

Reid shot her a small smile taking her word for it as he took a sip the tart but sweet liquid filling his mouth. He swallowed taking another sip before he spoke. “What is this?”

Rose cleared her throat having a hard time really reading his reaction. He hadn’t spit it out so that was a good sign. Hopefully he didn’t hate that she’d taken some liberties on deciding just which cocktail to make him. “It’s called Blood and Sand. It was created in the twenties to honor a Rudolph Valentino film. It’s pretty simple to make, just scotch, sweet vermouth, cherry liquor, and blood orange. It’s not bad…right?”

Reid raised an eyebrow partially wondering how she could classify this recipe as being simple to make, but then again he wasn’t the one who literally made drinks for a living. His usual drink of choice was just a simple glass of brandy, so this was different…not bad, but different than what he was accustomed to. He took another sip of the drink being completely honest. “It’s really good. Thank you.”

He spoke again once again not helping but to feel awkward that he’d interrupted her evening. She’d obviously had a guest over. Sure she’d said he could come over, but he didn’t mean to make her end her night early. “Thanks for everything…I mean, I know I already said it, but I’m sorry to interrupt your evening.”

Rose gave him a crooked smile not helping but to realize this was something she adored about him; his consideration for others. One the few dates they’d had she’d quickly picked up on just how empathetic and thoughtful Reid really was.

From hearing a few stories about his difficult childhood and his time in school she’d realized that the world hadn’t always been kind to Spencer Reid, but he somehow still maintained a tender heart.

She spoke soothing his worries once again. “It’s fine really. You didn’t interrupt anything, just Cara driving me bananas. I wouldn’t have said it was okay to come on over if it wasn’t okay.”

Reid furrowed his brow once again tempted to press Rose on the hostility between Cara and her. It was obvious that Cara was the dominant personality type who was accustomed to pushing Rose around, and Rose seemed to be too non confrontational to really want to rock the boat. He guessed that Rose taking the upper hand and asking him to join their outing had been out of character for Rose when it came to her interactions with Cara. She’d made a reach for power and Cara looked as though she was taking it as a challenge. He held it in though knowing Rose wouldn’t exactly enjoy being profiled in her own living room.

He managed to eat the last few bites of his sandwich before he spoke knowing he was repeating himself although he couldn’t stop himself. “I am really grateful you let me come by. That last case was really rough and I don’t really know if I want to be alone at the moment.”

He cringed a bit at the last part of his statement. He had to pray she wasn’t about to write him off as being clingy. Hadn’t he heard Morgan mention women hated clingy guys the few times Morgan had tried to give Reid advice on women Reid never asked for.

He was relieved that Rose didn’t shy away from him. She placed the cat on the floor Bela wandering off towards the back of the apartment allowing Rose to scoot closer to him.

Rose reached over her hand pressing against his. He allowed his fingers to link with hers as she spoke. “What happened in Maryland?”

Reid bit the inside of his cheek tempted to shut down this conversation. Part of him wanted to protect her from the reality of his career. That’s partially what he’d been trying to do thus far.

That was why he hadn’t exactly opened up about what had happened to cause him to be placed on leave for a few weeks when he’d first worked up the nerve to act on his crush and ask her on a date.

His mind was torn between two trains of thought. Part of him was screaming at him to change the subject, don’t tell her what had happened on this case or on any cases for that matter, protect her from the horrors he’d seen. The other part of him screamed that he couldn’t just shut down on her. If he clammed up and refused to share his troubles with her then she’d only grow to resent him. Resentment would only lead to heartache and it would ruin any hopes of having the relationship with Rose that Reid hoped to have.

He decided to listen to the most reasonable choice. “The case involved kids…I mean families if you want to get technical. The unsub was going after families.”

Rose furrowed her brow both at the unfamiliar word and the notion of murdered families. Reid resisted the urge to back down and clam up. He had to finish what he’d started. “Uh, unsub…it means unfamiliar subject. It’s the word we use in profiling to refer to the perpetrator. It stops police from giving whoever their searching for the notoriety of a nickname.”

Rose nodded her head a small frown still etched into her brow. She had a feeling that this method didn’t always work considering everyone on the face of the earth knew about the Zodiac Killer or the Son of Sam, though one had never been caught and one was dead people still had given these monsters infamy.

She resisted the urge to mention this thought out loud turning her focus on Reid as he spoke again his eyes staring down at their enclosed hand wanting to focus on this as he spilled his heart out. “The unsub made it look like murder suicides. He kept them alive for a four days, played out some kind of sick family role-play before he killed them all…he made the dad’s watch before killing them. There were two families we didn’t get to save…four kids in total.”

Rose gave his hand a squeeze searching her brain for the right words to say. What could you say when you were given information like this? She decided to follow her heart as she spoke. “I’m so sorry Spencer.”

Reid sighed the words falling from his lips. “You don’t have to apologize.”

He paused cringing a bit at his own statement. ‘Way to sound like a jerk’, a voice in the back of his brain taunted him.

He was thankful Rose didn’t seem to be offended by the comment only giving his hand another squeeze as she spoke. “I know, I’m just sorry you had to see that kind of thing…I guess you must see it more often than you’d like though. That must be difficult. It sounds like a heavy burden to carry.”

Reid nodded his head his thumb running along her hand as it remained clasped with his. “I do and it can be. We were lucky this time…we caught the guy before he killed the last family he’d targeted.”

Rose tried to give him a soft smile hoping she sounded reassuring and not dismissive of his feelings. “Then it sounds like things ended as well as they could at least.”

Reid let out a soft sigh nodding his head as he responded. “Yeah, it should feel that way.”

Rose took him by surprise reaching out with her free hand placing it hesitantly against his cheek forcing him to look up at her. She felt her heart ache as she realized his eyes were still just as troubled as they’d looked when he’d first entered her apartment.

She spoke softly stroking his cheek Reid leaning into her touch. “Talk to me, why doesn’t it feel that way?”

Reid let out a heavy sigh surprised at how easy it felt to open up to her. Then again hadn’t it felt easy from the start; at the very least it had felt easy on that first date when he’d opened up to her about his mother.

“When we first started the investigation, we had a suspect. The guy…he wasn’t a good person. He was the biological dad of two of the kids in the second family. He had a criminal record; domestic violence…he was abusive to his wife. We wanted to rule him out for both murders, make sure that he wasn’t our guy….one of my coworkers, Gideon, he ordered me to interview him alone. I was freaking out…it was my first solo interview…I had to talk to the guy, bring up his own history of being a victim of violence to get him to open up…He didn’t do it…he just found the bodies and ran because he knew the police would suspect him. He was so…broken. I know he isn’t a good person considering his past and his deeds but…”

Rose spoke finishing the statement. “No one deserves to lose their kids. Even people who suck. The pain of losing a child isn’t something you’d wish on your worst enemy.”

Reid nodded his head thankful that she’d so easily understood the point he was trying to make. He sighed as he spoke again. “I hate cases with kids.”

Rose felt her heart break all the more. He sounded so helpless, his eyes filled with so much sorrow. No one should carry so much sorrow.

She continued to stroke his cheek keeping a tight grip on his hand with her free hand as she spoke. “I wish I knew what to say to fix it…to make you feel instantly better. I don’t think that there’s anything I could say to make it better though.”

Reid closed his eyes soaking up her touch for the briefest moment he feeling at peace for the first time in at least a week. He opened his eyes as he spoke. “Just you letting me be here with you helps.”

Rose gave him a soft smile relieved that she was at least capable of providing him with some sense of comfort even though a guilty voice in the back of her brain told her she could be doing more.

She spoke finding it so easy to make a promise to him. “I’ll keep being there, as long as you need me.”

Reid felt the words dance around in the back of his throat but he resisted the urge to say ‘Do you promise? I think I might need you forever?’

It was too soon to ask her for something like that. Weren’t they still in the honeymoon phase of the relationship, they hadn’t even classified this as an exclusive relationship a voice in the back of his head reminded him.

He hushed this voice and instead chose to open up just a little more. “I keep having nightmares lately. I dream about this baby, it’s crying and I know I’m supposed to be protecting it, but I can’t get to it. I think it’s just my brain taunting me. I see horrible things every day and I know deep down inside that I can’t save everyone.”

Rose was sure that her heart had crumbled to dust with this comment. How could this man possibly be so sweet and selfless?

“You’re a human being Spencer. You can only do what you can.” Rose insisted the response so easy to find. He had to see that he couldn’t save the world, he had to understand that, didn’t he?

“Sometimes it doesn’t feel like enough.” Reid admitted a bit surprised as Rose leaned in her lips pressing to his cheek.

She pressed soft kisses along his jawline as she spoke trying her best to reassure him. “You do more than enough, I’m sure of it. You try your very best and that’s the best you can do. You’re a good person Spencer Reid.”

He felt a soft smile cross his lips soaking in her praise. He was almost tempted to beg to hear more, to ask her to say it again.

He instead turned to face her his lips sliding along hers. The kiss was meant to stay chaste but the heat easily grew between them their kisses growing deeper Reid more than accustomed to Rose coaxing his mouth open, he finally getting the hang of allowing his tongue to slide along hers.

He placed a hand against her cheek keeping her close to him as they continued to share kisses. Rose ran a hand through his hair messing his hair. She took him by shock moving to straddle him her lips not leaving his.

His mind raced as he took in the feel of her pressed against him like this. Her lips were so soft. She fit against him so well even with the awkwardness of her straddling him on her sofa. He placed his hands on her hips hesitantly unsure of what else he should be doing with them at the moment. He tried to shush the anxiety brewing in him as he focused on the feel of her tongue sliding along his. At least he seemed to have completely gotten the hang of this kissing thing, well for the most part.

Reid groaned as her hips began to rock against his, his body easily reacting to her. She moved her lips from his pressing kisses along his jawline nipping at the sensitive skin along his neck surely leaving a mark behind.

It wasn’t until her hands reached for the buttons of his shirt, slowly beginning to unfasten them, that Reid felt that panic he’d been fighting totally overwhelm him.

He spoke his voice frantic taking her hands in his pulling them from his shirt as he spoke. “Wait, whoa, just wait.”

Rose widened her eyes confusion washing over her lust dazed brain for a moment. Reid let out a heavy sigh shame and pure anxiety washing over his own lust.

A cruel voice in the back of his head taunted him; he was so lame, oh god he was such a dork? He ruined everything. He had been dreaming of this moment since the moment he’d laid eyes on Rose for the very first time. He’d been crushing on her for so long, telling himself he’d never be lucky enough to know her in this way. He finally had her and he’d screwed everything up. He had the girl of his dreams in his lap dry humping him and starting to undress him and his stupid panicked brain just had to pipe up and shut everything down.

He cleared his throat avoiding looking into her eyes as he let himself speak. “I think you’ve probably already noticed that I’m not the most experienced guy.”

He paused taking a deep breath as he forced the truth from his lips. “I’m actually, I’m…uh, I’m a virgin.”

He cringed more than sure that Rose would laugh him out of her apartment. Hadn’t most people lost their virginity by now. He was twenty four years old for heavens sake. He felt so inadequate. Surely she would write him off as some sort of hopeless loser now that she knew just how absolutely inexperienced he was. She probably thought he was pathetic.

He felt the breath leave his body preparing for the worst as Rose spoke. “I’m so sorry Spencer.”

She paused the next statement that left her lips taking him by surprise. “I shouldn’t have let myself get so carried away…I mean, I kind of figured it out…you were pretty freaked out the first few times we kissed. You got the hang of it, but I could kind of see it…it’s not a big deal though.”

Reid allowed his eyes to meet hers a frown crossing his features, his eyes squinting as a feeling of absolute confusion washed over him. “You aren’t ya know…turned off. I mean, I’m twenty four years old. It should have happened by now. I should have lost it a long time ago. I’m pretty pathetic.”

Rose shook her head one of her hands reaching up to smooth back Reid’s hair. “You aren’t pathetic Spencer. Everyone moves at a different pace. There’s no rule about what age you should lose your virginity. Trust me, most people regret losing it too soon…I know I certainly did.”

She noticed the way Reid’s brow furrowed further at this comment. She pressed a chaste peck to his cheek as she pulled herself from his lap. “Trust me, it’s a story for another time.”

Reid nodded his head panic still swirling around in him. “You don’t think I’m some kind of loser? I mean, you aren’t disappointed that I stopped things from going further?”

Rose was fast to speak taking his hand in hers again. “I don’t. I never could think that. Trust me Spence, it’s not a huge deal breaker for me. Like I said everyone moves at a different pace. Just because you’re moving slower doesn’t make you a loser. I’m comfortable with whatever makes you comfortable.”

Reid felt a wave of relief wash over him. She wasn’t going anywhere, she didn’t think he was inadequate.

He managed to pull her against him allowing her to rest under his arm, her head resting against his chest the position soothing after the conversation they’d had and the moment they’d shared.

He spoke his voice soft. “Thank you for being you.”

Rose chuckled giving him a soft smile not above teasing him. “I am pretty amazing.”

Reid resisted the urge to scold her choosing to nod his head in agreement. “You are. I do mean it though, thanks for being here for me. I know I kind of dropped in on you unexpected tonight. I appreciate you letting me lean on you…thanks for putting up with me being such a mess right now. Understanding who I am.”

Rose spoke the words falling from her lips. “It’s not that difficult to let you drop in on me. I mean I’m your neighbor. I’m happy to let you into my apartment any time. I’d be a pretty crap girlfriend if I told you no when you needed me.”

She cringed as the words left her lips. Oh great, they hadn’t even discussed if they were official or not yet. She’d pretty much jumped right into calling herself his girlfriend. What if it was too soon? Why’d she have to have this conversation now? Especially after they’d just almost gotten intimate? Why now? What if he didn’t feel the same? What if she was smothering him?

She spoke the words spilling from her knowing she sounded frantic at the moment as she began to pull from him. “I’m so sorry…I know we haven’t discussed it yet. I didn’t mean to just blurt that out. I mean I know we haven’t discussed if we’re exclusive or what we are yet.”

Reid resisted her attempts to yank away from him, he tightening his grip on her. “You don’t need to say sorry. I’m happy you brought it up. I want to be exclusive…I mean, is…uh, is that what you want?”

He cringed fearing she would say no. He’d never live it down if she said no.

Rose pressed a soft kiss to his cheek relief washing over her, her heart fluttering. “I do want to be exclusive. I’d like that very much.”

Reid smiled his heart swooning just as hard as hers. He had a girlfriend. Rose Walsh was his girlfriend. He’d wanted this for months now. He’d told himself it’d never happen in his wildest dreams, and now here he was.

Reid wasn’t sure how long they sat there silently enjoying one another’s company both soaking in the realization that they were official now, but he felt the yawn leave his lips before he could stop it.

Rose noticed it her voice soft as she stared up at him. “You look sleepy.”

Reid felt the words leave him a bit surprised by how easy it was to feel so vulnerable around her. Maybe it was just that she’d not run from him even with all she knew about him. “I don’t want to sleep…I don’t want to dream. I don’t want to be alone yet.”

Rose pressed a soft kiss to his cheek as she spoke an idea entering her mind. “Sleep here.”

Reid widened his eyes his mind racing. She wanted him to stay the night?

Rose pressed another kiss to his cheek calming his nerves. “You can sleep on the sofa if you want…I mean I’m not going to force you into my bed, I don’t know what you’re comfortable with. I mean…you don’t want to be alone, but you need sleep. You look drained Spence.”

Reid nodded his head ignoring the voice in the back of his brain that told him this was moving so fast. It was just sleep he reminded himself. “If you’re okay with sharing a bed, I’m fine with it.”

Rose stood from the sofa taking him by the hand and leading him to her bedroom.

Reid followed eagerly his heart racing. This was just sleep, he reminded himself. They weren’t going to do anything but sleep.

He wasn’t surprised to find that her bedroom was similar to her living area. The iron bed frame was covered with a black comforter. It was a canopy styled bed and Rose had hung black sheer curtains over the canopy.

Her dresser had been painted a deep purple and it was covered with various cosmetics and a few jewelry boxes. He was sure he could spot another ceramic skull, like one of the ones she kept in the living area, among the clutter. There were more candles as well.

The room was just as cluttered as her living area, and Reid told himself he’d have to take in all the details at a later time. That was part of what he adored about her apartment. There was so much to take in. She filled her home with trinkets and expressions of who she was. Her taste in decor was a little on the odd side and it favored a darker color scheme but Reid had found that he actually kind of liked it. It fit Rose.

Rose pressed a kiss to his cheek pulling him from admiring her room. “Do you need to get pj’s are your place? Or?”

“I have boxers and an undershirt….if that’s okay.” Reid blurted out his cheeks flushing.

“That’s fine.” Rose reassured him ditching her cardigan as she made her way to the dresser pulling out a different top.

She spoke again as she moved to the door. “I’m going to go change, I’ll be right back.”

Reid stripped down to his boxers and his undershirt before he quickly tucked himself under her comforter his heart still racing.

Her bed sheets smelled like her, her perfume mixed with the sweet floral smelling soap she used clung to the fabric and he felt himself sink into the bed all too easily as he was surrounded by her scent.

He knew his cheeks flushed darker as she returned to the bedroom. How could she look so cute in a baggy t shirt and a pair of black sleep shorts? She didn’t have a spot of makeup on her face and Reid couldn’t help but to think she looked stunning. She was by far the prettiest woman he’d ever seen, and he was in her bed. The thought made his head spin.

He studied the t shirt a small frown crossing his features he not recognizing the band other than knowing he’d seen the CD in her living area: Bauhaus.

He decided not to question it knowing he’d only prove how out of touch he was with most music other than classical music.

Rose felt her own cheeks flush as she made her way to the bed. Spencer Reid in her bed was a sight she had to like.

She climbed into bed beside him resisting the urge to snuggle against him. She shouldn’t push for too much too soon. He was clearly just as anxious as her at the moment. She should keep things G rated.

She chose to place her hand over his giving it a soft squeeze as she spoke. “Goodnight Spencer.”

“Goodnight.” He replied knowing his voice had taken on that higher pitch it usually contained when he felt flustered.

He was relieved Rose didn’t notice it as she turned over shutting the lights off making the room dark.

She turned back to face him surprised as Reid reached out placing his hand over hers again.

She gave it a squeeze surprised by how quickly sleep began to wash over her.

Reid took a bit longer to let sleep overtake him. To be honest he’d never been fond of the dark. He wasn’t about to ask that Rose leave a light on her for him though.

He’d already proven just how inexperienced he was, he didn’t want to reveal another pathetic facet of his personality. He shushed this thought reminding himself Rose didn’t think he was pathetic.

She was his girlfriend, he smiled at the thought. Rose Walsh was his girlfriend.

He listened to the soft sound of her breaths as she slept beside him his own eyes beginning to grow heavy.

Suddenly the literal darkness of the room and the darkness of his career didn’t seem like such a huge obstacle, not with the woman fast asleep beside him.

She wanted to be his girlfriend. She was his.

Now he just had to do whatever it took to keep her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I debated how I ended this chapter. I didn't want to make them move too quickly, but I thought it made sense given Reid's state of mind.


End file.
